Housing & Dining has thrown up some cheap-looking plastic signage around the Empti Lounge vending machines that reads “Market Central.”  How exactly a few standard vending machines qualifies as a “market” Bwog has yet to understand, but one thing we do know is that nothing says classy like fake plastic torchieres.

According to culinary anthropologist Jonathan Hill, “the vending machines are caught in some kind of arms race of gaudiness.  For years, the drink/snack machines were the only game in town; then the hot dog machine rolled into the neighborhood and destabilized the balance of tacky, so the drink/snack machine bloc responded by tarting itself up with plastic frippery. Now it’s the hot dog machine’s move, and I’m betting it’s going to be BIG.”

Though the administration’s next upgrade to the glorified meat locker remains to be announced, Bwog suspects that they might just be ready to plug the machine in.  Baby steps, H&D – baby steps.