Actual image from the first day of “Approaches to the Short Story”

Registration has never been particularly kind to the Creative Writing Department. Students apply for workshops right before the semester starts and have to get an Add/Drop form signed and brought to Kent, conveniently right downstairs from CW classes! the CSA. It’s not uncommon to hear complaints of a $15 “late registration” fee charged on top of tuition if you do this before CW’s deadline but after some undocumented date from the registrar.

Moreover classes are few and small, creating a bad space shortage with lots of demand with very little supply. Nobody knows how to show up to a full class and beg a teacher for admittance quite like a Creative Writing major. But guarding the door to a semester of Samuel Lipsyte is the extraordinary Dorla McIntosh, the Undergraduate Coordinator. Provider of cookies and coffee, Dorla is as quick to mercilessly kick you out of a full class as she is to give you a sincere “I’m sorry, baby,” as she tells you Cris Beam‘s “Literary Reporter” has been moved to the MFA program (even though last spring you got kicked out of the class cuz it was over-enrolled and seniors needed to take it and Dorla PROMISED she’d get you in this year but WHATEVER).

In late November, Dorla emailed that Amy Benson’s “Lyric Essay” class was over-enrolled due to a registrar mistake that didn’t put a proper cap on the course. She urged underclassmen to drop out and try other classes while first round registration was still ongoing. On January 7th, Dorla noted that the class was basically double-enrolled—36 students for a 20-max class. She included a list of 16 “approved” students and told everyone else to drop it like it’s hot.

“The Lyric Essay” meets tonight at 6 for the first time. Last night, Dorla sent out one final email with a list of 18 approved students and 3 waitlisters. In all caps, she closed her final message on the subject with “IF YOU ARE NOT ON THE APPROVED LIST OR THE WAITLIST PLEASE DROP THE CLASS.” So get out, and take your Hemingway with you. To quote Dorla:

AND PLEASE if you are “SHOPPING” this is so not a good store.  We appreciate your business but take it elsewhere.

We’ll let you know how nonetheless crowded the room is tonight.

Bwogtography via Shutterstock