Barnard professor takes complex life, adds people that don’t exist and scenes that never happened in places to which she may or may not have been to make a book that could potentially be construed as semi-autobiographical Having been gypped of one Fed job, Columbia gets a consolation prize New GS fundraising strategy: admit more […]

Brokers, landlords unite in subtle White-Wing conspiracy to keep New York segregated What? Discrimination in the sciences? Damn you Larry Summers! Quick, have lots of girls invade Pupin and blow up gummy bears! Asian-American fest lots of work, draws “everyone” Capitalism helps us be able to bear winter, be Christ-like, and remember the expulsion of […]

Don’t Double Major; It’s Unlikely Anyone Will Care Don’t Give Up on Fighting in Iraq, Because That Would Be Like Giving Up On The Football Team (or is it the other way around…?) Get a Flu Shot. Which will be $5 cheaper at Barnard. Live in the LLC or Risk: Not Making Friends, Not Reaching […]

Maybe we’re just better?  For the world, comedians. For Columbia, ex-Presidents!  Wednesdays = entirely superfluous. Ask, Don’t Tell–Columbia administrators riding high Support the team, not the record Urinetown! Urinetown! Urinetown!

Columbia Imposes Itself on Community Again; “Second-grader Julissa Beralto Agreed. ‘I Don’t Want Them to Take Our School Away,’ She Said.”  Then She Cried and Hugged her Puppy as They Both Opened Their Eyes Real Wide.  Look At What We Are Doing!  Monsters! And Then, All of a Sudden, the Expansionist Instinct is Noble Again. […]

Café Science solves Global Warming. Barnard plans new major. Pre-meds: crazier than engineers? Bob Dylan musical: worse than that Beach Boys thing EDITORIAL: Hey Everybody! I’m Liberal!

Prince Prestige kisses Alma Mater, wakes her up from five-year sleep High schoolers reach for stars, and, uh, here Václav Havel “changes world,” fails to impress “jaded” sophomores “Molly said I was accepted to fill the need for a public school, non-LA, non-San Francisco lesbian. And I took it to heart, because I got a B- […]

 Confirmed Reports: GOP Hires New Divorce Lawyer Don’t Hate the Playa…Hate the U.S. Central Command  Really Smart Former Soldiers Cry Foul. Don’t Believe Anything Anyone Tells You About the Army.  Aaahhhhhh! Real MonsterTrak (for Grown-ups)  It’s Tough Pissing People Off, But Someone’s Gotta Do It

Death all around you…or not Christian fundamentalists, more tolerant? Might be a losing battle. They like us! They really like us! Pretty pictures of people passing  Amazing Racing cutthroat bureaucrat  

Democrats Take the House; Republicans Settle for Car, Boat, Custody of Children Local Election Results as Boring as Local Elections SEAS Plots to Move Up in College Rankings, Solidifies Place as the Haylie Duff of Morningside Heights Look!  We’re Good at Things Sometimes! Meow, Meow, Meow, and You Shall Have No Life Successes.  I Mean […]

Columbia = SO Money Recent GS Graduate Runs for NYS Senate Against 34-year Incumbent Named Caesar, Who’s Really Just Thinking of This as a Good Excuse to Bulk Up His Collection of Knife-Proof Vests Vote or Die! Vote! Die! CU Libraries to Regain Sense of Self Worth Pending Opening of US Weekly Branch

Come on, get with it.  The world is changing right before your very tired, over-studying eyes. Isn’t it time for a core class in digital cartography? Dear God: It’s me, politically active student. Why God, have no famous politicians come to my school? What am I going to tell all my friends? What have I […]

Hillary Clinton Has a Blog Adviser. Squirrel Sets Fire to Dartmouth… …and in unrelated rodent news…Don’t Go Barefoot Anywhere Anymore Eminent Domain Still on the Table. Suburbia Still Not for Judy Zuhusky. Meanwhile, is there an opinion section today? And God said, let there be opinion: “Who the fuck takes cabs?”

Tel Aviv taps Zvi… …After mysterious disappearance of CB… …While Republicans shed party loyalty Take Back the Night hands out “pens, highlighters, chapstick, lollipops” at 1020, patrons confused Play includes “chicken farming”, “a fringed belt assembled from a shredded copy of the Columbia Daily Spectator”, “a Bible-quoting triple-murderer turned pizza boy”, “freedom” Spec serials continue their […]

SEAS cuts to the chase.  Barnard’s Strong, Bold, Beautiful women can study feminism (as long as they major in something real, too) Barnard jumps on the we-need-better-financial-aid too bandwagon.  Students find the school’s system “mysterious,” wonder why its endowment isn’t as large as some of its peer institutions’, and look to replace loans with grants. […]