Yearly Archive: 2018

Dec

17

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merry chrysler!

As the last weekend of fall semester comes to a close, Columbia still manages to have some meaningful events: like Orgo Night, Primal Scream, and lots and lots of exams. :(

Bwog Tries To Study

  • Had a MIDTERM
  • Finally sent out my resume/cover letter
  • I swear I actually managed to study for finals
  • Did not study
  • Failed epically at my first final!! three more to go woohoo
  • Wrote a 15-page paper on 90 minutes of sleep.
  • Had a lot of caffeine (I don’t normally consume it) and felt like I was high. But was still productive!
  • Wrote a 30-page paper, the longest I’ve ever written.
  • Finished all my studying on Thursday afternoon; stopped caring entirely, albeit prematurely, about the semester
  • Slept all day Saturday instead of studying
  • Primally screamed my stress away (not really)
  • Decided that studying can’t save me at this point.

Less academic content after the jump

Dec

17

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:'(

Amir’s, the little restaurant on Broadway between 113th and 114th that served Middle Eastern and vegetarian fare, has closed, at least temporarily. There is a sign on the door explaining that Amir’s “must close their doors for now,” but that the staff “feel that this is not a final goodbye”; they “hope to ‘pop-up’ really soon with a new and improved concept sticking to [their] historic family recipes.” Various appliances have been taken out of the restaurant onto the sidewalk, and the lights are off inside.

When Bwog called Amir’s number listed on their website, we got an automated message saying that it is a non-working number, and no one was inside the store. We will update this post if we get more information about why they had to close for now, and when they expect to reopen, if ever.

Amir’s was founded in 1971 and has been a Morningside Heights staple for nearly 50 years, with only a brief interruption when it was shut down due to health code violations in 2008. If it does indeed close for good, it will be the next in a series of Morningside Heights businesses that have recently shut down, including Aerosoles just next door, Amigos, and Nussbaum & Wu.

Meanwhile, we are compiling an in memoriam post for Amir’s; please send in your memories at Amir’s by commenting them below, emailing tips@bwog.com, or DMing us @bwog on any social media platform.

Amir’s via Youngweon Lee

Dec

17

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This smile alone should be enough for her to ace the LSAT!

Kicking off this semester’s Senior Wisdom is Barnard’s very own University Senator Kira Dennis! Check out her advice on everything Barnumbia, from libraries to favorite classes to just having some fun. 

Name, School, Major, Hometown: Kira Dennis, Barnard College, History, Hollywood, Florida

Claim to fame: Probably the University Senate emails I send out. My friends love to screenshot them and send them to me as if I have never seen the emails before. I have also gone to 5 Broadway shows in the last two months and won the Broadway lottery four times this semester. My dad is also one of 13 siblings and I am the 20th of 48 grandchildren. People usually think that’s pretty cool.

Where are you going? Home to Florida to study for the LSAT. Long nights spent studying and endless stress– it’s like I’m barely leaving college!

What are 3 things you learned at Columbia and would like to share with the Class of 2022?

1. Prioritize sleep- the assignment will get done no matter what. I slept from 2 to 5 AM every night my freshman year and sleep from 1 AM to at least 8 AM nowadays–and my grades have not suffered at all. In a seemingly contradictory but similar vein, go out more. School is important, but socializing is important, too. This does not need to include drinking or partying- just spend time with friends exploring New York City. The amount of time we allot to assignments is usually the amount of time they will take us. Be productive while you’re working so you can spend the rest of your time enjoying your college experience.

More wisdom after the jump!

Dec

17

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I unironically love Butler

In a previous Classical Whine, we expressed our love for ReCAP, but this time we’re shouting out a hero closer to home: the Columbia University Library System. This Classics major just really appreciates Butler, what can we say?

Whenever I hear people say they have never checked out a book from a library, I pity them for how much they are missing out. In my post about ReCAP, I talked about the 7 million books in a New Jersey warehouse that you can get delivered, but we need to talk about the THIRTEEN MILLION volumes that the Columbia Libraries have. I can’t fathom how large a number that is, but I do know how it impacts me on a day-to-day basis.

Simply put, I’ve never needed a book that I couldn’t find at a Columbia library. I’ve written about some relatively niche topics during my time here (ex. talking animals in medieval French literature, how Thucydides relates to the collective memory of the topographical imagination of modern Greece, whether Sappho was in a cult that worshipped the Muses or not, etc.) and I’ve rarely even had to request anything on ReCAP. Granted, it was annoying that one time when this one specific book I needed about how Augustine thinks Vergil belongs in hell was all the way in Burke, but it’s still amazing that it was accessible to me. Other than textbooks, I’ve never had to buy a book during my time here, because it’s literally all in Butler. (And, being a Classics major, I’ve even found some textbooks in Butler.)

rare books and more after the jump

Dec

17

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we miss you xoxo

Bwogline: HQ Trivia and Vine co-founder Colin Kroll, 34, was found dead in his apartment in New York City. The cause of death is assumed to be a drug overdose, although it has not been officially stated as so. Someone please make a vine compilation to celebrate this man.

Study Tip: Reach out for help! Don’t be afraid to ask teachers or TAs for help if you feel stuck on something. Many of them still offer office hours and/or review sessions, or you can email them as well.

Music: This song is a vibe. Enough said.

Procrastination: To take a break from studying, go out into the city for a few hours! The Bryant Park Winter Village is a beautiful place this time of year, and if you have your own skates, it’s free to use their ice rink (if not, it’s $20 to rent), and it’s only a 25-minute subway ride away!

Overheard: People screaming. Primally. Everywhere. It sounded like I was in the pits of hell.

Dec

16

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Artistic rendering of my suffering

THIS POST IS IN ALL CAPS BECAUSE PRIMAL SCREAM IS TONIGHT AT MIDNIGHT I.E. IN 12 MINUTES!! IT’S OUTSIDE OF BUTLER BUT ALSO EVERYWHERE!! SCREAM A PRIMAL SCREAM WHEREVER YOU ARE STANDING!! AHHHH!!!! LET OUT THE STRESS OF FINALS AND JUST SCREAM!!!!

SCREAM VIA BWOG ARCHIVES

Dec

16

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WALK HERE!

Staff Writer Ezra Lerner is sick and tired of you not being sick and tired but still ordering nearby food. 

If you have physical disabilities or accommodations that make it easier for you to Grubhub, this post is not for you. Big ups for taking the initiative to use technology to make this campus slightly more accessible.

For anyone else who uses Grubhub/Seamless to order Junzi to their dorm, though, you are the absolute worst person. The worst. The restaurant is on 113th. Walk there. Bike there. Ride a camel there. There is no earthly reason why you cannot get down to 113th.

And if you were wondering, yes the Grubhub driver who has his hands in electric gloves does think you’re a jackass for not going there yourself. I talked to every single Grubhub driver in the Manhattan area in preparation for this article, and they all said the exact same thing, that you’re “a jackass.”

You deserve tomato and egg: the worst kind of sauce. It is literally just tomato and egg. It tastes like motor oil. I hope that even when you order jaja, or the other one, they give you tomato and egg, because you are the tomato and egg of people.

done-zi with your junzi after the jump

Dec

16

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TAKE ME HOOOOME

Folks, tonight is our last open meeting! If you’ve got ideas you’re just burning to pitch, today is your last chance – save your seat in the stacks and stop by Lerner 510 at 9pm! In the meantime, and to celebrate going home (4 days left eep!), here’s a classic song.

Take Me Home, Country Roads

Almost heaven, Lerner 510, home of Bwog, all the way up the ramps
Life is good there, better than studying for finals, worse than nothing, eating all the grapes

Country roads, take me home to the place I belong
Lerner 510, campus drama, take me home, country roads

All my memories gather round her, miner’s lady, stranger to blue water
Dark and dusty, painted on the sky, misty taste of green grapes, teardrop in my eye

Country roads, take me home to the place I belong
Lerner 510, campus drama, take me home, country roads

I hear voices in the 9 pm hour, they call me, the pitches remind me of my home far away
And walking up the ramp I get a feeling that I should have been at Bwog yesterday, yesterday

Country roads, take me home to the place I belong
Lerner 510, campus drama, take me home, country roads

Dec

16

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obama writing his progression 4 in butler (colorized, 2018).

Bwogline: Progress on climate change was stalled at COP24 in Katowice due to the US, Russia, Kuwait, and Saudi Arabia refusing to acknowledge the IPCC’s report – its findings mean we have around 12 years to stabilize the climate, but right now we’re on track to 3°C of warming from pre-industrial levels.

Study Tip: Write out a study guide compiling all the relevant information/formulas you need to know. Having it condensed in a few pages will serve a reminder that it’s really not as much as you think – you’ve got it all down already! – and be handy for quick review.

Music: “That I Miss You” is the chill bob-your-head-to-this song you need for an instant pick-me-up. If you’re feeling those Sunday scaries later, just hit play and let the music do its work. YES the cover art looks kinda depressing but I’m telling you it’s actually such a bop.

Procrastination Tip: If you can’t focus and have too much chaotic energy to take a proper break, try something equally productive like cleaning your room or doing your laundry. It’ll make you feel better and definitely get you in the groove again!

Overheard: The fireplace TV screen in Noco – super cute and about as cozy.

Dec

15

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On Friday night, in the midst of finals, Columbia University held its first ever Naruto run down Butler lawn. Staff Writer Andrew Wang argues that the Naruto run carried extreme sociological significance, and believes that moments like these are important for Columbia’s sense of campus culture. 

When you have a final at 8 but have to get Sasuke back from Orochimaru at 9

According to the laws of physics, the Naruto run becomes advantageous when executed at extremely high speeds. This is due to the body’s aerodynamic configuration. By flailing one’s arms behind them, the body becomes more compact, thereby reducing drag and increasing speed.

In 2017, scientists ran multiple trials examining whether the same is true at humanly possible speeds. Test subjects would complete a sprint using normal running mechanics, and then complete the same sprint as though they were a ninja.

Some of the findings were as expected: most subjects reported lower speeds when running with their head down, arms back, and low to the ground. About a third of subjects, however, somehow clocked faster speeds this way. This should not have been possible. The scientists were baffled and immediately shut down the project. The paper was never published.

I believe that this phenomenon can be explained in the interviews that followed the study. When asked why the Naruto run made them faster, one subject reported feeling that it was “something outside myself” that made him run faster. Another interviewee reported that she felt “more connected” with the ninja community when she ran like them. This is the key to understanding why the Naruto run works. We do not run faster because physics says so, but because society does.

行くぞ! (Let’s go!)

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Dec

15

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Ah, Bwog Archives, a staff writer’s best friend when they want to spend little to no effort finding an image. However, staffer Sarah Braner has seen some things in there. Some… interesting things. As a big believer in “if I had to see this, so do you,” she has laid them out in one convenient spot for your viewing pleasure. (Original captions are in quotation marks, though the author has taken some liberties with adding her own comments as well.) 

More after the jump

Dec

15

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naruto logo

Elle Ferguson, Bwog staff writer, covers the most important events during finals season. AAHHHH!!!!

If you were around Butler last night at 9 pm, you may have heard students emphatically yelling “NARUTO!!!! SASUKE!!” until their voices turned hoarse. Last night was Columbia’s first (at least that we know of) Naruto Run event across low grass.

About fifteen people showed up to partake in the event. Stan Liao, a sophomore at SEAS, created the event as a way to destress from the strain of finals season. He was partially inspired by Butler’s “T-Pose” event from last year and by the fake Naruto Run event floating around Facebook. “I expected a bunch of people to say they were interested, but I thought it would be maybe me and two other people running down this f****ing lawn,” says Stan, describing his surprise that the event gained traction on Facebook and led to a modest turnout.

But what happened?

Dec

15

img December 15, 201810:30 amimg 0 Comments

here are the happy rocks i screen printed instead of studying :))

Bwogline: Last Saturday, Patricio Manuel became the first openly trans man to compete in a professional boxing match in the U.S. Manuel, 33, said he’s been in love with the sport since first stepping into the ring when he was in high school. He won the fight against Hugo Aguilar, but the crowd booed and whistled at him. But, Manuel said he doesn’t let it affect him as his love for the sport outweighs the negativity.

Study Tip: If you have a hard time concentrating on your work and are prone to checking your phone every 2 seconds, try the 40-20 study method! It’s 40 minutes of studying followed by 20 minutes of break/rest. I have a problem of constantly getting distracted while studying and this helped a ton. Make sure to set a timer so that you are strict to your schedule.

Music: “Nobody” by Mitski is a great song to study to, her voice is soft and isn’t too distracting. Though make sure not to listen too closely because it’s all about loneliness and might make you a bit sad.

Procrastination Tip: Make something! If you are going to procrastinate, channel your anxiety and frustration into creating. It can be knitting a scarf, writing in a journal, painting, sewing, collaging, or any creative craft of your choice! If you’re going to procrastinate, might as well have something to show for it.

Overheard: CUMB making as much noise as humanly possible at 2 am outside my dorm.

happy rocks via Mary Clare Greenlees

Dec

14

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img December 14, 20188:35 pmimg 1 Comments

I may have suffered last week, but times have changed; I was so used to giving and now I get to receive. That’s right: my final papers are turned in, my takehome finals submitted on Canvas, and my ass has long since left each uncomfortable desk for each sit-down exam. I am done with finals on the first official day of Finals Week, and I’m leaving New York tomorrow.

Me and the squad looking down on youse

If I were to describe how I feel in a few words, they would be “free” and also “superior.” Ne’er again (till midterms next semester) will I enter the beige innards of Butler Library. Ne’er again (till midterms next semester) will I compile the most haphazard study guides known to mankind. Ne’er again (till midterms next semester) will I try to go full Charybdis on all the weeks of reading I didn’t do.

As I watch you mere mortals toil away, with your exams at 7:00 pm on the 20th and your papers due the morning of the 21st, I sit in my standard-issue dorm chair throne and laugh. When I get on that noontime United flight out of Newark, praying that I don’t get dragged from my economy aisle seat, my soul will be light with the knowledge that I am leaving this campus while others… aren’t. I have every Björk album downloaded on my Spotify, and not as study music, but as the soundtrack to my freedom; no longer am I held captive by “Classical Music for Studying & Brain Power | Mozart, Vivaldi, Tchaikovsky.” In short, there are no responsibilities to my name, and many responsibilities to all of yours.

To all y’all still staring down all that work, I have just two things to say:

(1) Can’t relate
(2) “Good luck,” because I think that’s what you say to people who have more thing to do. I don’t know, I can’t remember; it’s been so long, you see, since I’ve had to care about anything school-related. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

Teamwork dreamwork via Pexels

Dec

14

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Freshman Bwog staffer Jordan Merrill has no idea what to expect from the band’s semesterly Orgo Night, and she is not disappointed. 

Queens Isabel and Betsy of the marching band making everyone laugh at Orgo Night

After forcing my friends to come to Butler with me a full 30 minutes before midnight so that we could “get the best view,” I feel prepared for whatever chaos is about to ensue. I find myself standing on the edge of a bench outside Butler, on the verge of falling and completely eating shit, but excited nonetheless!

This year’s Orgo Night marked a change from the traditional Butler 209 performance; the marching band performed their routine right in front of Butler, which the administration has been calling for since 2016. There has been some struggle between the marching band and administration in recent years, and the band decided to not take any risks this semester by holding the event outside.

Despite the outdoor in venue, a crowd begins to form at Butler’s entrance at around 11:45. As more people arrive, the energy in the air becomes palpable and finally, I hear the distant sound of some trumpets and drums playing every Columbia student’s favorite song, “Roar, Lion, Roar.” As they make their way to the front of Butler, people, as well as instruments, begin screaming. Betsy Ladyzhets, BC’19 and Isabel Sepúlveda, CC’21 (two of Bwog’s very own!-who are not affiliated with this review in any way) take center stage/center path-in-front-of-Butler as Orgo Night’s main comedians.
more about orgo night after the jump!

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