Morningside Heights has slowly been transforming into a spooky place for the holiday season. Bwog endured the fright caused by this metamorphosis to snatch some photos of the changes.

Morningside Heights may have spent all summer heaving great sobs of loneliness, but it isn’t about to greet newcomers and returning students with super puffy eyes. On the contrary, it’s been having quite a bit of work done. Send any minutiae we missed to tips@bwog.com.

Whether you’re wallowing in mid-summer discontent after having caught up on all things Hulu, or discovering the god particle and stuff at your internship, we thought we’d let you know that things on our end are just as boring as you left ‘em.

So you can revel in the anticlimactic glory that is our beloved Morningside, Bwog catches a few last-minute minutia that might have made all the difference to your morning coffee/mental state during this darkest night, finally lifting.

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Ominously black televisions adorn Brownie's once-bare walls

The sun may have obscured itself behind thick fog, but the boring remnants of spring still remain!

Be on the lookout for the February issue of The Blue & White, coming to campus this week. In the meantime, Bwog will again honor our heritage/amorous affair with our mother magazine by posting features from the upcoming issue. Such treats include a visit to the Lamont-Doherty Earth Observatory, an investigation into Columbia’s animal testing practices, and the first part of a discussion on The Columbia School. But much more relevant to your Thursday night evening is senior editor Allie Curry’s below exploration of the history of The Heights Bar and Grill.

Illustration by Emily Lazerwitz, CC '14

For many Columbians, admission to The Heights is the first litmus test of a Thursday night’s success. Popular for their potency, every $5 happy hour margarita poses a formidable challenge to those who frequent the establishment. Dutifully attempting to do as its street- level sign instructs and dine above it all—to get in, students must get past the bouncer and fight their way to the bar through a room packed with screaming sorority girls and rowdy basketball players. So what’s it doing in a Paul Auster, CC ’69, GSAS ’70, novel?

Considered by many to be one of America’s foremost contemporary postmodern fiction writers, Auster draws upon metafictional techniques to blur boundaries between reality and fiction, and to advance what critic James Wood describes as, “narratives [that] conduct themselves like realistic stories, except for a slight lack of conviction and a general B-movie atmosphere.”
In his debut novel, City of Glass, Auster describes his protagonist, a detective-fiction writer named Daniel Quinn who grows hungry after a hard day spent trailing his lead. He writes:

He retraced his path along 107th Street, turned left on Broadway, and began walking uptown, looking for a suitable place to eat. A bar did not appeal to him tonight— eating in the dark, the press of boozy chatter—although normally he might have welcomed it. As he crossed 112th Street, he saw that the Heights Luncheonette was still open and decided to go in.

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It’s that season again, when savvy organizations try to use your warm and fuzzy emotions to rake in some cold hard cash. There’s a strong showing this year– but who does it best?

The holiday season has hit your wallet hard, and now the bills are coming in. Think you can cut down on your spending? Not with everything Morningside Heights has to offer…

Whether you’re now in a taxi from LaGuardia just in time for your first class, or you’ve been scrubbing double-sided poster tape off of your dorm walls all break long, the Carousel of Progress has marched on with naught a look your way in our fair neighborhood. Join Morningside Heights as it proudly struts its New Year’s stuffs:

College Walk’s annual tree lighting ceremony may be this Thursday, but it’s already been five days since Thanksgiving goddamnit, and we just couldn’t wait. Decidedly non-denominational holiday cheer abounds in these Boringside Heights, and we want you to revel in it. Seen any other festive frivolities lurking around the neighborhood? Spot the occasional “Dank Pine” or “Capitalist Conifer?” Send ‘em to tips@bwog.com, and we’ll add ‘em to our collection. 

Bringing you the lastest in Morningside minutia: the Lerner stairs between floors two and three are broken. This is really important for everybody who checks their mailbox, and/or takes the stairs.

Thanksgiving—it’s on Thursday! And of course, our favorite Morningside Heights establishments are quite cognizant of this fact. Window turkeys and seasonal flavors abound, and we’ve rounded them up for your viewing pleasure. Happy Thanksgiving, everyone!

It’s November, which means it’s time to harvest the crops and begin the time of festive feasting. Columbia, in recognition of this, is doing its part to help you grow out that “winter coat” around your midsection.

This week, it’s all about the subtleties of Columbia architecture. Can you tell the differences in the photos below?

Update: Further architectural curiosities abound! A tipster has sent us the photo below, showing a new “little blue bird creature” nestled between a few objects on the ever-growing 114th median sculpture. Curious in that it was added after the fact; curious in that the sculpture there now seems to differ so much from the original design. Maybe this little guy is surfin’ all up and down the UWS: it appears his home is at 72nd Street.

Hi is this my home

Shoulda thought twice before joining the Titans, little man

Perhaps he is there for structural balance? Or maybe he has been condemned to a life of holstering the statue’s weight for betraying his brother. Either way, since Bwog last passed by the sculpture, this strange little blue man has entered the postmodern circle of life.

What’s going on here? Stay tuned for a review of the project in the upcoming issue of The Blue & White.