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A Tail of Two Mascots: or, Roareeo and Milliet

While the lucky among us are having either stressful finals sex, or fuck-it-I’m-graduating-and-I-ain’t-doing-it-a-virgin sex, our noble collegiate mascots have their own erotic story of deprivation and degradation to tell. An anonymous author shares the first part of this Bwog-exclusive series. There will be flirting, foreplay, sex, and hopefully playful “experimentation” between roommates. But before you send this link to the Fox News Jesus Brigade, rest assured that this story ultimately concerns innocent love, and is in the best of jest!

Starstruck feline

Roaree looked at his phone, hoping for a text message. Nothing showed up except the time: 9:47 on a Sunday night, and he was stuck in Butler. He had barely cracked open his copy of Pride and Prejudice and was already staring blankly at the pages. How was he supposed to focus on Elizabeth and Darcy when he was caught up in his own romantic troubles? He wistfully recalled lying in bed that morning, his claws caught in her luxurious fur, hoping for a morning repeat of last night’s performance… he quivered at the thought before reprimanding himself. “Focus,” he growled. “Studying is way more important than what happened last night. She probably doesn’t even remember your name. Let it go.” But as hard as he tried, Roaree couldn’t get the image of her beautiful brown eyes, half-closed in bliss as he stroked her from head to paw.

“What did you do last night, Mills?” Millie’s roommate squealed and playfully hit her with a pillow. She blushed and shook her head. “Nothing, it was nothing, really,” she mumbled. “Okay, fair enough – maybe I should be asking who you did instead of what! Don’t think I didn’t notice you loping down Broadway with someone last night. Who was he?” Millie paused. She normally wasn’t the type to lick and tell, but she couldn’t hold back much longer. “I don’t know. Roaree? Roaree Lion. He goes to Columbia.” Her roommate shrieked. “Roaree? Of course I know him, everyone does! He’s, like, a big deal. Super popular with the athletes, always hanging out around campus… I think he’s even done some modeling. What happened?” Millie sighed. She knew that this would happen. Hooking up with someone like Roaree was bound to be big campus gossip. And for good reason–Roaree was popular, smart, and, of course, very attractive. His college walk strut made Millie’s fur stand on end, and when he roared her name last night in bed she completely lost control. Never before had she felt so thoroughly overwhelmed, and yet comfortable, as a lion worked her over.  Should she text him saying she had a good time? No, she told herself. She was just another Barnard freshbear who had been seduced by his thick mane and cocky attitude.

Barnard to bed...

Monday passed slowly as both Roaree and Millie thought about the pleasure Saturday night had brought of them. Roaree couldn’t focus on Music Hum when all he wanted was to hear Millie’s soft, guttural grunts against his ear as he pushed himself deep inside of her warmth. Across the street, Millie ordered lunch from the Diana Center, but as she munched she realized she would much rather have a certain plump, throbbing feline appendage inside her mouth instead of a delicious flatbread pizza. As they ached for each other’s touch from opposite sides of Broadway, hope threatened to flutter away for both. Would Saturday’s sexcapade turn into something more substantial, something romantic and meaningful? Or were they fated to spend one passionate night together before parting for the rest of their undergraduate careers, never to cross pawpaths again, yet never to forget?

…Stay tuned!

Roaree via CUMB, Millie via her Facebook.

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  • O.o says:

    @O.o Wow… that was like reading porn on some obscure, extremely specific website … I don’t think I’ve spent enough time studying to overlook how mcnasty those details were.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous It seems as if there is a furry on columbia campus. Their climbing in your windows, their snatching your fluff up, trying to yiff em so y’ll need to…

  • kitty porn says:

    @kitty porn “but as she munched she realized she would much rather have a certain plump, throbbing feline appendage inside her mouth instead of a delicious flatbread pizza.”

    can’t tell you how many times I’ve had this same exact realization!
    – professor david epstein’s nephew

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous “his claws caught in her luxurious fur”

    heh heh…fur

    But seriously, can we replace the furry fucking for two generic names? If I wanted to think of furry shit I would have visited 4chan…

    1. That's the joke! says:

      @That's the joke! I don’t think this is really what people consider “furry porn.” It’s just regular college erotica with a few key details modified since the main characters are mascots. But that’s what makes it funny! If it was just regular boring erotica, it wouldn’t be on bwog; it’d be on c-spot.

  • this is says:

    @this is pretty amazing. it’s sort of just batshit insane enough for finals. loosen up, columbia.

  • Rue says:

    @Rue Oh wow, whoever wrote this needs to get laid badly

  • Drunk says:

    @Drunk What the fuck did I just read?

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous I thought it was great and definitely wonderful for procrastination. Post the rest of the story soon!

  • awkward bro says:

    @awkward bro awwww yeaaaa Roaree gettin that morning sex ahah…

  • Roar-ee says:

    @Roar-ee Being the mascot at some point in time, I’d like you all to know that this happens all the time. We all have furry friend fetishes.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous dang, is this what finals has done to bwog?

  • Goddamnit says:

    @Goddamnit Fuckin’ furries.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Furries fuckin’.

  • lol says:

    @lol It’s literotica…on Bwog!

  • sex? says:

    @sex? LOL AS IF IM HAVING SEX HAHAHAH I GO TO COLUMBIA, REMEMBER?!?!?! pretty sure I signed a document forcibly ensuring my abstinence upon submitting my deposit after I was accepted here.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous I loved it

  • Dear Bwog, says:

    @Dear Bwog, What happened to you this semester??
    Please go back to the Bwog I knew before

  • i aint no furry says:

    @i aint no furry But I loved this! So cute, so angsty, so REAL (except for being about mascots). Keep it coming. Next up – Alma Mater and the Barnard Athena statue become lesbians until graduation.

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous except both statues are of Athena…

  • not enough mention says:

    @not enough mention of the word “yiffing”

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous gotta love furries!

  • What the fuck did I just read? says:

    @What the fuck did I just read? …maybe it’s just the Butler Goggles kicking in (Butler Reading Glasses, perhaps?) but I loved this.

  • IDK what you guys are talking about says:

    @IDK what you guys are talking about I came.

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous Typical Barnard hoe

    1. Anonymous says:

      @Anonymous Typical Columbia hoe

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous Typical hoes

        1. Anonymous says:

          @Anonymous Typical Columbia v Barnard bwog fights

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous tl;dr

  • Anonymous says:

    @Anonymous This is the best bwog can do? You know you go to columbia when…

  • hilarious says:

    @hilarious this was cemented as awesome for me the moment millie’s roommate described her earlier walk as “loped”. physically-appropriate-descriptors-for-movement ftw.

  • alum says:

    @alum Yeah, I was gonna contribute to the Columbia College Fund…after this, not so much….

  • oh man says:

    @oh man It was kind of a funny and easy procrastination tool….. until it got to the part about guttural grunts and pushing into her warmth. Was not expecting that much

  • woah says:

    @woah thoroughly skeeved out by this

  • Tag says:

    @Tag Roareerotica for the win.

  • woah says:

    @woah anyone else reminded of that creepy CSI episode?
    mascots are already grotty enough

  • that would be funny says:

    @that would be funny if it weren’t so sad

    1. sorry, I couldn't help says:

      @sorry, I couldn't help Well you have been replaced.
      I don’t need anyone now.
      When I delete you maybe
      I’ll stop feeling so bad.

      1. Anonymous says:

        @Anonymous go make some new disaster
        that’s what I’m counting on

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