Top of Their Class: Facebook Heroes of 2015 — Austin Akins

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The start of a night full of regret...

Given the predisposition of 2015 to Facebook and the general madness that is a Columbia pre-frosh page, Bwog is profiling the famous and infamous stars of social media. In Top of Their Class, you can read about some of the people you met on the Internet, on the Internet.

Name: Austin Akins

Famous for: Planning to live it up in Carman with his roommate Wyatt, representing the Columbia wrestling team, epigrams of social insight

Significant Posts:

“been looking for a cougar since I’ve been legal” – August 6th at 2:24 p.m.

“um, excuse me? do you realize, when I was only 5 years old, I led an entire ARMY of G.I. Joe’s over pillow mountain to defeat the evil troll empire? don’t tell me i’m not influential” – August 24th at 1:15 p.m.

“Did anyone else just have an earthquake? That was pretty sweet. I was just like bouncing on my bed… “– August 23rd at 1:16 p.m.

“Repost this if you are a beautiful strong black woman who don’t need no man” – August 20th at 3:56 p.m.

Has anyone approached you solely because of your Facebook celebrity status?

“Yeah definitely. Several people come up to me and are like “are you Austin from Facebook”? I’ve actually done that to a lot of other Facebook celebrities as well.”

Did your roommate Wyatt live up to your expectations?

“I LOVE WYATT. Wyatt is my best friend now, I could not have chosen someone better.”

What was your experience with the earthquake like?

“I was still asleep and it started shaking my house. I woke up, and stood up on my bed and started bouncing. I figured I wouldn’t have enough time to escape so I just kept bouncing”

Do you think a dichotomy exists between what the way people view you on Facebook and the way people view you in real life?

“I hope not. People like me on Facebook and I am pretty sure they like me in real life.”

What do you have to say about Columbia wrestling?

“Columbia wrestling is on the rise. Right now, the freshman class it just outside the top 25 recruiting class rankings. We are working well, there is a lot of chemistry, and things are looking up.”

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  1. Anonymous  

    This makes me sad for Bwog

  2. Anonymous  

    How come sadder is a word and funner isn't?

  3. Anonymous

    Columbia Wrestling failing at life for...oh forever.

  4. Columbia Wrestling Representative

    We're not all obnoxious. Please don't stereotype us as one-dimensional meatheads. Hope to see you at some home matches in January.

  5. Bystol

    You all give the wrestling team a lot of hate yet not one of you could tell me the format of a match. I doubt you could tell me the difference between a sweep and a switch. We ranked 3rd in the country for team gpa and along with quite a bit of community service. I highly doubt anyone posting could make it through a week of what we do; train, pass classes, and still find spare time for community service. If you are willing to try to do what we do ill send you a schedule of what we do. Why would you end funding for Columbia Athletics. There are those of us that are currently training for the Olympics and others are trying to go pro. You can be good at what you are good at and we'll do what were good at.

  6. Anonymous

    To whomever wrote that Columbia should end funding for athletics, you may want to reevaluate your opinion of athletes because we may be your superiors some day. We take the same classes as you do on top of spending a part of every day participating in those athletics, and still we take part in community service projects. Don't stereotype us based on a couple of seemingly meatheads.

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