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Primal Scream for Noobs

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 24 Comments

Finals got you down? Then you can verbally vent your frustrations by participating in the Primal Scream. The guide for new students: If your clock or watch is not auto-synced to the NIST’s Cesium Fountain Atomic Clock (i.e. the Internet), make sure you’ve set it correctly. When in doubt, Bwog recommends a cell phone for superior accuracy. […]

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The Graveyard Shift: Butler, 4 AM

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 26 Comments

There was a time, not too long ago, when being at Butler at 4 AM meant something was wrong. Matthew Schantz, Mahima Chablani and Brian Wagner remember that time. In our third and final installment of Graveyard Shift, Bwog takes a stroll around Butler just before the sun comes up and finds lots of people […]

graveyard shift

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ROTC on Campus: Past, Present and Future

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 44 Comments

In the wake of the repeal of Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, the issue has resurfaced about the banning of the ROTC (haven’t a clue? everything you need to know about the Reserve Officers’ Training Corps here) on Columbia’s campus. This has been a contentious subject in recent years on campus. Here is a brief history: […]

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PSA: O’Connell’s Is Where People Find True Love

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 32 Comments

Bummer-ama in Sunday Styles today: Carol Anne Riddell and John Partilla got married last month after meeting in their children’s pre-K class and then leaving their respective spouses for each other. Oof! But the real news: they had their first date at O’Connell’s, which is, as a physical entity, the opposite of Love. Riddell and […]

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Don’t You DARE Think There Are Any Seats in Hamilton

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 20 Comments

CUZ THERE AREN’T. ANY. Or in Butler. And no one is gonna let you forget it. Observe: Signs from left to right read: “This Room is in use!,” “DO NOT DISTURB!,” DO NOT TOUCH CHALKBOARD PLEASE,” “OCCUPIED!” and “TAKEN.”

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Professor Archetypes: The Language Prof Who Just Doesn’t Speak English

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 10 Comments

As long as schools like Columbia champion the “sink-or-swim” school of language instruction, you will inevitably come into contact with, whether in fulfilling your requirement or just being intellectually curious, the Language Professor Who Does Not Speak English. This professor can exist in any language department. The idea of this professor is that you are […]

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BwogSalon: Sanctum

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 24 Comments

Bwog has hopped, poked, and swiftly skimmed, but now we’re inviting other writers into the Bwog Bubble. We think there’s lots of fantastic campus journalism out there that sometimes slips under the radar. In the spirit of Enlightenment salons from centuries past, we present our newest feature, BwogSalon. Bwog asked the editors of each publication […]

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Frontiers Of Science: It Ain’t Poetry

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 23 Comments

Freshpeople! You tired, you poor, you huddled masses gathering to take the Frontiers final today: we promise, college isn’t always like this. To provide some last-minute assistance, here are some haikus sent by one of your own. If you have other haikus, Frontiers-related or otherwise, leave ’em in the comments. Good luck, friends! Two distributions […]

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Lost: Cell phone

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 0 Comments

Black Verizon LG cellphone with slide-out keyboard possibly dropped between 116th station and River Hall. Reward offered. Emailcmd2159@columbia.edu if found.

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Professor Archetypes: The Activist

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 32 Comments

While working as a professor, the Activist is forced out of his/her/non-gender- specific-pronoun’s natural habitat. Best suited for the front lines of some genre of consciousness-raising event, this experienced and opinionated speaker captures the class with what seems at the time to be an extremely relevant argument against society’s unnecessary gendering of bath products. The Activist Professor sits crisscrossed […]

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The Finals Weekend Showdown: Finals vs. Papers

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 55 Comments

Another vintage post from our archives for you to contemplate while holed up in the library… With classes completed and a weekend now free to bemoan our misery, Bwoggers weigh in from Butler Cafe/salon: what’s worse, studying for finals or writing papers? Papers Remember: every essay is an open book test. With class notes, a few […]

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The Bwog Finals Fortune Teller

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 14 Comments

We’re stuck in Butler too, wishing we were back in elementary school when all we had to do was color in the circles and not calculate their velocities relative to the Sun as they hurtle through space. Holding fast to the spirit of youth, we’ve created a cootie catcher. Now this toy you once used […]

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Let Them Eat Grilled Cheese!

Bwog Staff 2

columbia culinary society
FeelGood
food faceoffs
foooooood
grilled cheese is our ambrosia
heaven in a sandwich
it's for charity y'all
that is one big hunk of cheese

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Deluxe Betrays Us! No More $5 Burger Mondays

Bwog Staff 8

a crime is a crime when it's unjust and this is unjust
burgerlary
bwog appreciates these tips
ergh
fight the burgerarchy
goddam money grabbers
jjs FTW
maybe i wont eat so many burgers tho
mondays used to be okay now they're just shitty ugh
produce???
producing misery
what did i do to deserve this?

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Bucketlist: Book History, Futurism

Bwog Staff 1

art stuff
bucket list
futurism
now that midterms are over...

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Bwoglines: Regina George Edition

Bwog Staff 0

america is cady heron in this metaphor
but who is karen...
bwog will try and fit in a mean girls reference anywhere we can
canada is totally gretchen weiners
is it seriously supposed to fucking snow tonight
oprah could actually beat up lindsay lohan if she wanted to lets be real
oprah cursing us out would actually be so scary tho
regina george more like russ-ina george amirite

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Columbia Against Humanity

Bwog Staff 21

bwog makes card games
cards against humanity
columbia against humanity
maybe we'll play this while we watch do housing coverage
take a shot every time you feel like dying
we're about to get our pants sued off

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Meeting Tonight: Special Monday Edition!

Bwog Staff 1

black and white
bwog meeting announcment
eating with bwog
gummy bears
mississipi john hurt
Monday blues
motherfuck spring break is over
special mondays

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Harmeet Singh Sohal, GS Student, Passed Away

Bwog Staff 2

condolences

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Housing: So Many Questions, So Many Answers

Bwog Staff 21

Bwog Housing
bwog suitens the deal
don't believe our insults housing is actually so complicated
housing
jk we just read the housing website
some bwoggers got really great picks and others got shitty ones
suite puns
we know ewverything
yall are a bunch of lazy fucks but we love you for it

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