He stared into her glistening eyes and said, “My name . . . is Tuesday Bwoglines.”

Sitting next to two girls eating lettuce with balsamic vinegar and wearing the same brown boots and sweaters: “I just feel like birthdays are so cliché.” “Wait, why is no one washing their face?  Is it National Don’t-Wash-Your-Face Day?” After some thought… “I’m a pseudo-vegetarian.  But doesn’t that apply to fish as well?”