Earlier this week, we were tipped a document stating that an alleged Russian spy was recruiting at a “major” NYC university…perhaps Columbia? Inspired by this McSweeney’s column, our top conspiracy theorist describes the double life of a Columbia student turned secret agent. You begin preparing for your life in the shadows in the second week […]
Cynthia Murphy, one of the Russian spies who has destroyed everything that is holy (Montclair, New Jersey) attended Columbia B-School, and got her MBA in May, Bloomberg (not the mayor) confirms. That means we all went to school with a SPY! The Kremlin probably has your UNI on file or something. Putin knows that you […]
Hate Letter: “Midterms”
March 1, 2025I Bid Farewell To My Beloved Sweet Corn Turtle Chips
March 1, 2025I Bid Farewell To My Beloved Sweet Corn Turtle Chips
March 1, 2025I Bid Farewell To My Beloved Sweet Corn Turtle Chips
March 1, 2025