With less than two weeks of classes left, chances are you’ve found yourself Butler-bound, day after day. And that elite species of Blue Java-loving Stacks inhabitants—known to the more general public as the Butler Archetypes—are by your side the whole time. Rest your head on Conor Skelding’s very soft shoulder as he reminds you why that’s a bad thing…

Flip-phone selfie taken by Louise McCune

While more practical students use cNet terminals for a quick print, these patrons of the library have a loftier goal—populist film criticism.

Writing under pen names such as “nycQT2015″ and “butlerbabe69,” they craft sharp invective, intended to cut down those presumptuous enough to upload sub-par content to Youtube. Such apt critiques take minutes of painfully complex consideration—should they begin with the more straightforward, “You obviously know nothing about Return of the King,” or prove their superiority with a pithy line such as, “You’re just a dick, like Saruman”?

Whether ensconced in the computer lab, 209, or the Ref Room, these arbiters of Internet fodder impress everybody waiting patiently to print. Before the day is done, they will even showcase their abilities to enjoy the ultimate no-brow entertainment: drooling, gaping infants. And what do they have to say for themselves?

“OMG CUTEG4SM.”

this, not this)—Ira Glass’s honor is under attack. The mastermind and host of WBEZ Chicago’s “This American Life” is the star of a celebrity sex tape, Public Radio Nerd No. 1, Austin Williams, explains. ”>

Mr. Glass himself, looking a little less sweaty.

Public radio nerds, light your torches and sharpen your pitchforks (this, not this)—Ira Glass’s honor is under attack. The mastermind and host of WBEZ Chicago’s “This American Life” is the star of a celebrity sex tape, Public Radio Nerd No. 1, Austin Williams, explains. 

Well, sort of. Julian Joslin, (also older brother of CC junior Isabella), and Michael Grinspan, both CC’09, created a brilliant 11-minute parody episode of TAL in two acts (including a closing credits Torey Malatia joke) in which Ira decides to make a sex tape, on air, with Fresh Air’s Terry Gross. Joslin’s take on the icon’s nasal delivery and writing style is spot on. It’s good enough that we’re willing to bet at least one person now believes they’ve heard their favorite radio host’s coital noises. The video is ridicule born out of love, of course; you don’t mimic Ira Glass that well unless you’ve listened to a whole lot of his show. That may have been lost on the man himself, though, who couldn’t even make it through a complete listen.

The real Ira, in the Village Voice:

“I’ve listened to about three minutes of it. His imitation of my writing and delivery are so dead-on, it was hard to keep listening and I stopped. If I had to articulate why, I think it was because hearing his version of me, made what I do on the air seem kind of dumb. And the impersonation was so good, I couldn’t really pick a fight with it. So I had to decide, do I want to see myself as kind of trite and dumb? Seemed better to stop. Maybe I’ll go back sometime.”

Buck up Ira, we love what you do. (Check out the Blue and White interview with him from way back when). As for the other voices, Huffpo explains Julian trolled NPR footage and spliced Terry from nine different “Fresh Air” episodes. And to TAL devotees, watch at your own risk: listening to the podcast while folding your laundry on Sunday mornings will never be the same.

Before AND after shot via Wikimedia Commons.

As promised, Columbia College’s interim dean, James Valentini, just released a video to the Columbia community. For about ten minutes, he explains why he is dean, his vision for the College, his bit part in this Prangstgrüp video, and how he cringes at some parts of Bwog (don’t worry, we do too). Valentini assures us of his dedication to undergraduates and that the College is in great shape. On being interim dean he explains, “The opportunities the Dean has do not depend on the length of the service but on the depth of his commitment to the College and the breadth of the support he/she enjoys with the College community.”

He promises further engagement with students—we just hope there are more videos to come. Thanks for caring about us, [dean to be nicknamed]!

It’s a cheery 59 degrees outside! Take your work out on the lawn, bask in the sun, read on the steps… squirm (?) on Low Plaza…

Alan Brinkley is busy these days: ending his term as provost, checking on the numbers of his many adoring Facebook groups, and being accosted by roving cable news reporters. But he’s also had time to check out YouTube, and he’s got some recommendations.

Of course, being a famous name, Brinkley isn’t just going to put them in his “Favorites” section. He’s an eGuider on eGuiders.com, one of “your trusted voices who find and recommend the best original online videos and share them with you. Let us do the searching so you can do the watching!” Other eGuiders include Jerry Stiller (Frank Costanza) and Damon Lindelof (Lost‘s co-creator).

Brinkley’s only added two videos so far – JFK’s Inaugural and an exchange between Ann Coulter and Al Franken – but perhaps stepping down as provost will allow him to add all those mixtapes he’s been dying to forward you.

More specifically, join the Columbia Marching Band at midnight in Butler 209 for loud music and hilarity at Orgo Night.

To procrastination!

UPDATE (11:37 p.m.): Students have trickle in, and a Public Safety officer is standing ominously in the corner. Also, Hillel’s handing out stress balls.

UPDATE (11:50 p.m.): 9 minutes before start time, people have begun climbing on desks, and the Hillel stress balls are flying through the air. Bwog’s not sure that was their intended use.

UPDATE (12:45 p.m.): Show’s over folks – recap to follow shortly, followed by video tomorrow.

It’s raining. You’re not going outside. Good thing we’ve got a bunch of videos shot on the campus in sunlight.

1. You never thought you’d see a homemade Radiohead video shot in John Jay. Well, OK, maybe you did:

Read more…

Ahmadinejad spoke to 60 Minutes and the interview aired about an hour ago.  His smirk, defying all odds, actually beat that of our own President.

UPDATE, 11:35 PM: John Krauss took this post and just made it extremely trippy.  

The march of overachievers continues today as Bwog salutes Frances Jeffrey-Coker C’10. The frolicsome freshman apparently decided that CCE’s Wall Street connections didn’t go quite far enough, and has decided to enter “the ultimate internship contest”, offered by the promoters of Will Smith’s upcoming film, The Pursuit of Happyness [sic] for, among other things, a coveted Morgan Stanley i-banking slot. The NY Times business blog, Deal Book, advertised the finalists a few days ago, among them our very own Frances, who can now count herself among the elite the Times has deemed worthy of the title “next Aleksey Vayner“.

Bwog gives Frances a pretty good chance given the competition. One discovered the contest when rummaging through her email’s trash bin and can’t seem to stop monotonically self-deprecating, while another claims to have enjoyed warming his basketball team’s bench and feels the need to preface one comment with “while Michael Jackson’s advice may not be the best for life…” Then there’s the “honors finance student” whose minimalist video proclaims that he works for a “buy-side institutional investor institution” before declaring “I want to become a better artist.” In this context, who can fail to be charmed by Frances’ classical campus backdrop, pop culture references, and her serenade to the soundtrack of Sister Act II? Quoth the Times, it’s simply “the most cinematic video of the four.”

See (and vote) for Frances’ and the other contestants’ videos here.

-CJS

UPDATE: …and, if you’re so inclined, join the related Facebook group for moral support.

Commencement is being webcast (rather well) by the school here.

Anton Glamb, that perpetual headliner of campus concerts, has made one of the trippiest music videos Bwog has seen in quite a while. In the words of bemused tipster Alex Kudroff, the film features “sweat (I think), gold boots, dark spaces, and words I can’t understand with love fairies or something.”

Not to be missed. Find it here.

The ever-so-helpful Columbia homepage has a story about Natalie Portman’s legendary visit to Stuart Gottlieb’s Terrorism & Counterterrorism class. Most important, however, is a link to the video footage! See Natalie on Van Am Quad! See Gottlieb looking hot! See yourself, unshaven and weary-eyed, totally unprepared for contact with Hollywood royalty!
Also, there’s a full list of other celebrities that have suprised stunned students all over the country. Natalie Portman ranks high in the absolutely random assortment of people: Elie Wiesel, Marilyn Manson, Kareem Abdul-Jabbar, Ashley Judd, Frank McCourt, and Snoop Dogg, among others.

Bwog was idling around, and then it received this email from the Columbia Musical Theater Society:

CMTS Presents Andrew Lippa’s
THE WILD PARTY

Roone Arledge Auditorium
March 23 – 11 pm
March 24 – 8 pm
March 25 – 7 & 11pm

$5 CUID / $8 GA

For ticket reservations, please email cu.wildparty@gmail.com
Please be aware that this show contains mature themes not
suitable for all audiences.

View the trailer!

Note to those who check out the trailer–”mature themes” is not a codeword for nudity. There’s some really great mock-fellatio, though.

It apears that Larry Summers may still have a fruitful career ahead of him, not in economic modeling, but in rap. At least, that’s what this video would suggest.

Picture at right: LL Cool J gives a shout out to Larry.
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Seen on a Student Government Office computer during the weekly Fed meeting: The Wikipedia entry for “Slash Fiction.“

What is Slash Fiction?

Slash fiction is a type of fan fiction in which one or more media characters are involved in a homosexual relationship as a primary plot element. These gay pairings are often described in explicit detail, and largely occur outside the canon of the source. …

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