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Sep

13

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Chances are you’re already overwhelmed with readings though!

Welcome back to Barnard! Convocation takes place today at 4:30.

The email from Dean Natalie Friedman reads as follows:

Hello Students! Just a reminder that Convocation is tomorrow, 9/13, in Riverside Church. The proceedings begin at 4:30, and students should plan on arriving around 3:45. Your Class Deans will meet you outside of Riverside starting around 3:45. Here are a few things to keep in mind:

–Be sure to wear your class year t-shirt, picked up at this year’s Block Party, to Convocation. (If you did not pick-up a t-shirt at the Block Party, not to worry, we’ll have t-shirts available at Riverside Church when you arrive!)
–Please meet outside Riverside Church, located at 490 Riverside Drive, as early as 3:45pm (or 4:00pm if you’re coming from a class) where you’ll see your class dean outside the entrance. At 4:05pm, we’ll have classes enter the church. Please note that an accessible entrance to Riverside Church is located at 91 Claremont Avenue. Staff will guide you to Barnard Convocation in the Nave.
–The ceremony will last approximately one hour, and a reception will follow on the Barnard campus (Milbank Courtyard, rain location: Event Oval).

Please note that Barnard classes are cancelled from 4-6pm so that you may attend. Columbia classes are not cancelled. Some Barnard classes may also be meeting; you should make attending class a priority, whether at Barnard or Columbia. When in doubt, contact your instructor.

See you tomorrow!

Dean Friedman and Executive Director Lawrence

Sep

13

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img September 13, 20189:34 amimg 0 Comments

1100 bucks and it won’t even come with douchey AirPods.

What’s Happening In The World: Apple announced it’s releasing three new phones and fucking up its naming system more than ever before with the XR, XS, and XS Max. They range from normal to near-iPad sizes, and also from the “affordable” $749 to the whopping $1099. That’s like, a hundred bucks less than a MacBook. What are you even doing, Apple? (The Verge)

What’s Happening In The US: Three Trump-related disasters for the price of one: First, the New York Times reported that the number of migrant children being detained in shelters is the highest it’s ever been at 12,800. Second, Trump bragged about his response to Hurricane Maria and Puerto Rico, even though 3,000 people died. And third, while promoting his father’s response to Hurricane Florence – which hasn’t landed yet – Eric Trump said something that Paul Ryan might call “textbook anti-Semitism” and then not do anything about. (NYTimes, CNN, Mashable)

What’s Happening In NYC: Don’t forget to vote in the New York State primary today if you’re registered! This is your chance to decide between a person who eats whack bagels and a corrupt lizard man for our Governor. Go get it and find your polling place here.

What’s Happening At Columbia: Head over to Teachers’ College at 6pm tonight for a book talk on “Rule Makers, Rule Breakers: How Tight and Loose Cultures Wire Our World. “As part of the Perspectives on Peace series…the event will include a discussion with Dr. Michele Gelfand in conversation with Dr. Peter Coleman, on her most recent book. Book signing and wine and cheese reception to follow.”

Bop of the Day: 

Sep

5

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img September 05, 20181:50 pmimg 0 Comments

look at that marigold though

Ever wondered why some ways of getting around the city seem to follow all the rules but screw you over anyway, and why others follow no logic at all but are somehow useful? Senior Staff Writer Sarah Harty explains. 

  • Lawful Good: Yellow cabs are an icon of New York that don’t deserve to be overshadowed by their for-hire competitors. There’s something to be said about the convenience of hailing a cab. Also, your actions in taxis have fewer consequences because no ratings.
  • Neutral Good: Find me someone who’s taken the NYC Ferry for something other than a festival. I’ll wait. Regardless of its inaccessibility, the ferry is pretty fast and, hypothetically, a really nice way to commute.
  • Chaotic Good: It’s free, it’s easy to get to, it has beautiful views, and then what do you do? The Staten Island Ferry certainly has its highs and lows. The epitome of chaotic good, the SI ferry brings you not only the Statue of Liberty, but the 30 minute wait in the St. George Terminal to go back to Manhattan.
  • Lawful Neutral: Need to get out of town? The Metro North/Northeast Regional (or if you’re bougie, the Acela) will take you there. They get points for comfy seats, legroom, and tables, but lose them for cost and shitty wifi.
  • True Neutral: The Roosevelt Island Tramway. Costs the same as the subway, and there’s no traffic or delays because it’s literally in the sky. True to its mission, lowkey cool.
  • Chaotic Neutral: The tried and true subway system doesn’t always run on time, or have AC, or offer an even remotely pleasant experience, but it will get you where you are going, eventually. (Exception: The L train, which is pure evil.)
  • Lawful Evil: FHVs (Ubers, Lyfts, and the like) were just capped by the city for a reason. Their exponential growth has brought NYC traffic to LA-levels, and given that they account for like 80% of cars on the road but are only full 40% of the time, must be stopped. Or at least “studied”.
  • Neutral Evil: The slowest city buses go around four miles an hour. The fastest? Not even ten. The $6.50 fare for express translates to a lot more money for not much improvement. Only good for getting across Central Park.
  • Chaotic Evil: NJ Transit takes you to New Jersey. Enough said? Maybe so, but on this train, the journey might be worse than the destination. Its unreliability, penchant for breaking down, and contributions to each “Summer of Hell” are undeniable. Plus, it leaves from Penn Station and not Grand Central, which means you have to go to Penn Station.

Honorable Mentions: Central Park horse carriages (chaotic good), NYPD cars (lawful evil), Access-A-Ride vehicles (lawful good), Citibike (lawful neutral), Barnard/Columbia Shuttles (neutral evil), Blade (neutral evil), NYC Sightseeing buses (true neutral), LIRR (chaotic evil)

Sep

1

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img September 01, 201810:27 amimg 0 Comments

Would rather do a neighborhood tour in Prezbo’s Audi

Columbia knows you probably got way too drunk on Voda last night, regardless of whether you actually found a party to go to. That’s why today’s activities are mostly optional, so welcome to the neighborhood tours! Before you say, “I’ve got four whole years to go to all these places!”: No, you don’t. If you don’t go to Brooklyn now, you will never go to Brooklyn. So pick a tour, any tour, and enjoy the penultimate day of NSOP. 

Today’s Highlights:

  • Neighborhood tours, all day: Go out there, beyond the confines of Morningside Heights. From Coney Island to the Cloisters, now’s your chance to see all the city actually has to offer. Or, you know, not, since these are 100% optional.
  • International Students and Allies Mixer/Black Students and Allies Mixer, 2-3 pm/3-4 pm: Get to know more of your fellow students and work on making those #friendsforlife! Find another “interesting fact about you” for another group of people you might never talk to again!
  • The Columbia Amazing Race, 10 pm – 12 am: Join the Residence Hall Leadership Organization (RHLO) to play the Columbia Amazing Race throughout campus! Learn about Columbia hidden gems and complete exciting tasks to finish the race!

One thing to do before graduation: Find a genuinely reliable place to store your “everyday valuables” (phone, CUID, wallet) that’s easily accessible and also not around your neck! By never losing your ID, you’re saving yourself at least twenty dollars. This will be the only thing for which future you will thank NSOP you.

From the archives: The Weeknd was spotted on campus! Hopefully he’ll return – If homeboy comes through with Bella Hadid, he could like, get it.

May

11

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img May 11, 20182:02 pmimg 1 Comments

Hidden in the halls of Reid – a legit palace.

I feel like I shouldn’t even be writing this article. “But the people deserve to know!”, you say, and I begrudgingly agree.

Here at Bwog, we’re really passionate about the best bathrooms at this school. From our series “Poopin’ in Pupin” to our love letters, we’re determined to bring you the optimal places on campus to cry, procrastinate, or, like, do what you normally do in bathrooms. But I’ve noticed one that has been egregiously kept out of the conversation: The Reid first floor bathroom.

I’ve probably already lost a lot of you. Barnard dorms aren’t super well known as it is, and Reid is one of the least talked about, often being eclipsed by its air-conditioned hallway partner Sulz/Reid. But Reid proper does exist, and in its “lobby” one can find Well Woman and be a well woman (or anyone else) by locating the single stall toilet that is truly the best and most underrated bathroom at both Barnard and Columbia.

So why is it so amazing?

May

8

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img May 08, 201810:04 amimg 0 Comments

Maybe Elon is just looking for the top lip to his bottom lip.

Bwogline: Who the hell is on Melania Trump’s staff that they keep plagiarizing her stuff? She put out a brochure on cyberbullying (the irony is still insane) called “Be Best”, and many noticed that its contents are “nearly identical” to an Obama-era booklet on the same topic. Citations are not that hard, guys. (BBC)

Study Tip: E-mail your TA with any last questions, and one of them may as well be “Do you want to get lunch sometime?”

Music: Restore your self confidence with this 2013 bop by Justin Bieber while imagining all the crazy shit he would have done with the Met Gala theme. Probably host a church service or something tbh.

Procrastination Tip: Pack up your stuff and clean your room! No late or cleaning fines > good final grades.

Overheard: “I know all of Twitter is shitting on Grimes, but come on y’all, who wouldn’t hop at Elon as a sugar daddy?”

May

3

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img May 03, 201812:05 amimg 6 Comments

After many delays and denials from Ann Thornton and other administrators, and much persistence from the band, CUMB has made the decision to storm Butler 209 tonight, May 3, at midnight. And it won’t be a secret this time – so no more wondering how they managed to sneak a bass drum in.

Head Manager Vivian Klotz sent an email to administrators outlining the band’s plan: enter Butler just before midnight and then take 209 at 11:59pm, as is traditional.

 

May

1

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img May 01, 201810:17 amimg 0 Comments

Our most faithful friend.

Bwogline: John Kelly definitely didn’t call Trump an “idiot”. Hm, I’m having déja vu…

Study Tip: According to the wise words of one Bwogger, if you’re writing a paper, just take it 100 words at a time.

Music: Or follow the rules of this classic bop.

Procrastination Tip: Mourn your chances of getting with your hot TA even when they might be literally the same age as you. If you are a hot TA, mourn your chances of ever finding love.

Overheard: “That mix of hair and dust is just so *clenches fist* … college.”

 

Apr

24

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The MTA improving something? I’m shook.

What’s Happening In The World: A van in Toronto rammed into a crowd on Monday, killing ten and injuring 15. The driver has been identified by police as Alek Minassian, a 25 year old Toronto resident. He is currently in police custody. (BBC)

What’s Happening In The US: Mike Pompeo is about to get confirmed as the new Secretary of State. Overview: He’s like Trump – bigoted and gross – but he’s probably not crazy? More than we can say about the woman who might replace him at the CIA… (NBC)

What’s Happening In NYC: What do we want? Better subways! What are we getting? Double decker buses…on Staten Island. Only slightly less inconvenient than going to London to ride the OG. (Patch)

What’s Happening At Columbia: Former Attorney General Eric Holder (CC ’73) will deliver the 21st Annual David N. Dinkins Leadership and Public Policy Forum Keynote Address. Miller Theatre, 6 – 7pm, but probably best to get there early!

Overheard: “Stacks? ;)”

Apr

20

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An updated take on a classic Greek myth.

Imagine taking a story that’s already really sad, and then making it a hundred times sadder. That’s what playwright Sarah Ruhl does with the Greek myth of Orpheus and Eurydice in “Eurydice”, and CU Players’ take on the update gives it all the devastatingly emotional twists and turns it deserves with its stunningly talented cast and beautiful production. 

I haven’t been this enchanted by umbrellas since The Nanny Diaries, or this angry about stones since…ever. “Eurydice” does a lot with inanimate objects, making you have feelings about everything from “The Complete Works of William Shakespeare” to a bunch of strings. Countering these are very animated performances from our leads, Eurydice (Elli Furukawa, BC ’19), Orpheus (Jordan Mahr, CC ’20), and Father (Mario Garcia, CC ’21). Furukawa showcases hilariously contorted facial expressions as well as ballet and singing skills. Mahr is also a triple threat, staying true to Orpheus’ love of music with his acoustic guitar and strong voice.

This play deals with serious subject matter. It includes trigger warnings for sexual assault, suicide, and the death of a loved one. It might follow that it’s not particularly lighthearted. In fact, I was tearing up ten minutes in.  This is mostly due to Garcia’s performance as Eurydice’s late father, who can watch his daughter from the underworld but never contact her. (Get ready for the saddest wedding scene ever). One of the few souls who has retained the ability to read, write, and speak, he sends Eurydice letters from beyond the grave. Eurydice soon meets her untimely end, after some confusion and interference from the Little Stone (Mira Soni, CC ’21), the Big Stone (Stacy Grinberg, CC’ 18), and the Loud Stone (Cybale Mayes-Osterman, BC ’20), she and her father are reunited. Maybe the underworld isn’t so bad after all.

More review after the jump!

Apr

17

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img April 17, 201812:17 pmimg 0 Comments

Does this mean we’ve had 264 valedictorians?

Graduation? It’s real. To prove it, Columbia College has just announced the valedictorian and salutatorian of the class of 2018, and congratulations are in order for Sam Goldberg and Hannah Bender, respectively! Goldberg, a sustainable development major, said that the honor is “really unexpected and humbling,” while Bender, a biology major, likewise said she feels “incredibly humbled and honored.” The two will speak at Columbia College’s Class Day on May 15, a day before University commencement.

Apr

10

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img April 10, 20189:02 amimg 0 Comments

Putting the “no” in Nom Wah.

What’s Happening In The World: An air base in Damascus was hit after the devastating (and illegal) chemical attack on Sunday. The air base attack was apparently attributed to the U.S., but was then revised to Israel – though, given that we spend billions on Israel’s military, they weren’t totally off with their first guess. (NPR)

What’s Happening In The US: Special Counsel Robert Mueller ordered a raid on Trump lawyer Michael Cohen’s office. We don’t know why yet – Stormy Daniels? Russia? Both?  – but we do know Cohen and Trump are really mad about it, citing “privileged communications.” Someone tell either of them who Richard Nixon was, please. (BBC)

What’s Happening In NYC: Assholes shouldn’t be rewarded with dumplings, but that’s exactly what Nom Wah founder Wilson Tang is doing by accepting Bitcoin at his newest location, a bar called “Boys Don’t Cry.” Um, they do when their Bitcoin value goes down. (Futurist)

What’s Happening At Columbia: Academic Freedom Week continues with an event called “Fuck White Supremacy.” You’re already interested. It’s in IAB 1201 from 12-1 pm today.

Overheard: “I get hit on by more straight guys at Suite than anywhere else.”

Apr

3

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img April 03, 20189:00 amimg 0 Comments

Do I own this? Maybe.

What’s Happening In The World: Since its first insurgency in 2003, Boko Haram has launched numerous terrorist attacks across the world, and they don’t seem to be coming to an end: on Sunday in northern Nigeria, more than a dozen people have died after militants from the group clashed with soldiers. (Author’s note: I had to go to the third page of Google search results to find this. Do better, please.) (BBC)

What’s Happening In The US: Teachers in Oklahoma and Kentucky are protesting lack of funding to their schools, a couple of weeks after strikes in West Virginia led to pay raises. Love that grassroots action and properly subsidized education! (NBC)

What’s Happening In NYC: Canadian Prime Minister and Prime Hottie Justin Trudeau will speak at NYU’s commencement this May. Um, catch me transferring? (NYU Local)

What’s Happening At Columbia: If you wanted to go to the screening of “Art is a Weapon”, the story of “Bulgarian Sephardic film artist, novelist, anti-Nazi saboteur and lifelong revolutionary” Angel Wagenstein, it’s been rescheduled to tonight at 6 pm at the Harriman Institute (IAB 12). The event will also include a Q & A with director Andrea Simon.

Bop Anthem Of The Day: O, Canada. Obviously.

Mar

20

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An accurate photo of the bake-off.

Spirit “Week” may be a misleading title, since it’s really only three days, but in any case, get ready for some amazing baked goods! McAc runs a Barnard Spirit Week every year, and this year’s theme is  “The Great Barnard Baking Show”, inspired by “The Great British Baking Show”. The events include a cupcake decorating competition where you can win tasty prizes from Momofuku and Baked by Melissa.

The full schedule is on the Facebook event, so go and get baked!

 

Mar

20

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img March 20, 20189:35 amimg 0 Comments

You know Barnard wouldn’t miss tweeting about this.

What’s Happening In The World: Brexit negotiators have made a step forward, laying out clearer plans for the transition period that will occur in winter 2020. There’s still the issue of Northern Ireland, which wants to avoid a hard border with the Republic of Ireland, but a timetable is in place. Eurotrips of the future will mourn the loss of London as a destination. (BBC)

What’s Happening In The U.S.: A self-driving car? What could go wrong? Well, it went very wrong when one of Uber’s autonomous vehicles struck a pedestrian Sunday night. Uber has postponed all other self-driving tests and their CEO expressed his condolences and concern on twitter. (NBC News)

What’s Happening In NYC: Actress, activist, and Barnard alum Cynthia Nixon announced her run for governor of New York on Tuesday. She will reportedly challenge incumbent Andrew Cuomo from the left and on her website criticizes him for exacerbating corruption in Albany and “running as a Democrat but governing like a Republican.” We all knew Miranda was secretly the best.

What’s Happening At Columbia: The Weatherhead East Asian Institute and the School of Social Work are co-sponsoring an event called “The Politics of Compassion: The Sichuan Earthquake and Civic Engagement in China”. Author Bin Xu will discuss the outpouring of aid after the 2008 Sichuan earthquake and the “moral-political dilemma Chinese citizens face” when it comes to civic engagement. It will take place in IAB 918 from 1-2 pm.

Fun Fact: Andrew Cuomo is married to Sandra “Two shots of vodka” Lee.

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