Senior Staff Writer Henry Golub ’84 names the plants.

So you’re spending fall break on campus? And you won’t be leaving your dorm until your first Wednesday class? Bwog hopes you’ll be able to reach whatever mental state necessary to recover from midterms and get through the final months of the semester. Here’s how you can fill your time (or waste it) from the comfort of your room.

Serial procrastinator and stressed staff writer Nicki Camberg didn’t feel like studying for her midterms. Instead, she compiled all the things she and the rest of Bwog have been up to instead of being productive and furthering their education. 

Inspired by her favorite Twitter account, here are Senior Staffer Sophie Tobin’s Columbia takes on out-of-context quotes from America’s favorite tall child.

Columbia buildings have weird names that don’t accurately describe what they are. Here are some names for buildings that Bwog came up with you should use.

Intrepid bwoggers and swing enthusiasts Josh Tate and Sam Losee venture out into the wilderness dodging a sea of hyperactive children, shady raccoons, and Columbia students totally not doing anything suspicious in the park with the express purpose of discovering which swing set is the best between 96th and 120th street.

After what felt like an eternity, the scaffolding was finally taken down from the perimeters of the Barnard Quad, and access was finally allowed to the center of the Quad. First-Year Barnumbian Joanna Yu reviews the new and improved (?) Barnard Quad.

Think back to all the elementary school classroom decorations! Getting a new winter coat! Pumpkin carving with your siblings! Going to apple orchards! Decorations!  When we’re bogged down with midterms, it’s hard to put that extra effort into celebrating the season! But still–let’s give it our best shot!

We’ve been at school for only a month (although it feels like at least seven years have passed since Labor Day), and the walls of my room remain tragically, depressingly bare. If you’re finding yourself in a similar unfortunate situation, lament no longer–Bwog staffers have compiled this list of decorative possibilities for adorning those blank canvases! –Stolen John Jay silverware, […]

I am a medicawwy wicenced wittle baby pwofessional. 

I don’t normally write “Columbia Buildings As Blank” posts, but I thought this had to be published.