The overlap between Lit Hum students and Carman residents is considerable enough that new Bwoggers Michael Wang and Zoe Ewing calculated the fastest way to get from one end of campus to the other. Beware the Butler smoke. 

Your roommate taps on your shoulder.“Don’t you have a 10:10 today?”

Google Maps conveniently laying out the 0.2 mile trip.

You drowsily roll over and look at your phone. It’s 10:06 a.m. Your roommate is right: Lit Hum starts at 10:10.“Fuck!” you say, probably. Let’s pretend you actually care about your classes and you want to get to Lit Hum, which is located in Hamilton. What do you do? Luckily, we’re here to help.

There are 3 different routes from Hamilton to Carman (4, if you include jumping across the fence and taking the ~hypoteneuse~, but we’re not agile or geometrically literate enough for that). Each is technically 0.2 miles long but the exact distance in feet could make the difference between sneaking in at the last minute and walking in to 22 stares at the exact moment your professor says “phallic image.”

Route #1: The College Walk Route
Distance: 908 ft
This route seems pretty nice. You get the ~aesthetic~ of walking down College Walk like a true Columbian (not the nationality), and the long stretch along the path from the 114th street gates to College Walk feels satisfyingly direct. But is it the most efficient route possible? Probably not. But until they take down the tree lights, we say this is the best path if you want the scenic route.

Route #2: Strutting down the center path                                                                                                                            Distance: 908 ft
If you ever need a boost to your self-esteem, this is the best option. Don’t walk on the pavement though; the only way to walk this path is through the grass median. There’s nothing more satisfying than trampling millions of tiny grass people on your way to class and, as a plus, you can stare down the couples making out at the benches on your way to discuss Greek incest. It’s the exact same distance as Route #1, so plan according to your mood.

Route #3: Cigarette smoke
Distance: 816 ft
This path is probably the fast-track to Hamilton, but it’s also probably the fast-track to lung cancer. You have to walk the entire length of the path in front of Butler, weaving your way through clouds of deadly smoke like a French soldier in World War I. Yes, it’s the shortest path, but at what cost?

Milstein’s vision should include feeding Bwog

On February 15, 2018, students sampled coffee for the new cafe in the Milstein Center. Here are other snacks Bwog wants to see!

• Fruit cups with berries, pomegranates, etc. No honeydew – we’re tired.
• Real granola
• Boba
• A soup station that is regularly replenished
• House-made juices
• Green grapes
• Avocado toast
• Boxed water
• Baklava
• Soft pretzels
• Flan
• Dirty potato chips (that’s a brand, not the quality)
• “THIS SNATCHED ASS WAIST”

Comment your favorite snacks and hope the gods of Barnard dining are listening.

Bwog’s new kickback spot via Barnard

Every Tuesday, Bwog brings you a recap of the previous night’s Engineering Student Council (ESC) meeting. This week was…interesting, to say the least. Luckily, fresh Bwogger and seasoned SEAS student Krithika Kuppusamy stepped in to cover it.

The ESC President, Aida Lu (SEAS ’19), has officially been removed from office, after successful impeachment during the general body meeting yesterday.

Background

At last week’s meeting, Montana St. Pierre (2019 Class Rep) moved to impeach Aida in the middle of the Professional Development Representative’s discussion. This may recall Montana’s similar move to impeach Austen Paris (the ex-VP of Finance) at the end of last semester.

Section IV. A. b of the ESC Constitution states that “the executive board is expected to exercise proper judgement before calling a member for formal review,” and Section IV. B. b. i. states that “the impeached member must be informed of the motion for impeachment.” At the time of last semester’s impeachment motion against Paris, President Lu and VP Qamar stated that the impeachment being motioned for in a public meeting fulfilled the second statute. Last week, when faced with a very similar move to impeachment, Lu recused herself from discussion after a speechless six seconds.

Read about how the impeachment went down.

Meet Anna Coerver, astrophysics student and Bwog’s very first profile for CU Women in STEM!

Bwog Science is bringing you a brand new column, CU Women in STEM! In this feature, we’ll be highlighting the amazing women in science at Columbia. Our first profile is from Anna Coerver (BC ’20), who is as bright and exciting as the stars she studies! 

Major: Physics

What subjects are you interested in? I honestly love most of physics, but I’m all about the astro side–I’m really interested in compact object theory (magnetars, black holes, neutron stars) and cosmology. Also, I love solar physics, anything with a weird magnetic field, anything that explodes, and light phenomena like rainbows and spectroscopy.

How did you get interested in astrophysics? I knew I liked physics in high school, but for some reason, I literally never thought about outer space. Both of my parents are art historians, so science wasn’t really a casual conversation topic in my house, and my high school didn’t offer anything astro-related. I took a class my first semester freshman year called “Theories of the Universe: Babylon to the Big Bang” because it sounded history-like and because I was interested in science history. Somehow, this class totally hooked me on space! The semester after, I took an astronomy class where I went on a spring break trip to an observatory in Arizona. The time in nature plus the astrophotography plus the stars were all I needed to push me into astrophysics as my main interest, and it’s snowballed from there.

What research have you done? I work with the NuSTAR group in the Columbia Astrophysics Laboratory doing high-energy astroparticle physics. I analyze X-ray and gamma-ray data of really energetic objects like pulsar wind nebulae and black hole binaries.

What are your career goals? I want a PhD in astrophysics, and I think I want to be a research scientist, hopefully with my own lab some day. Then again, I might end up living at an observatory on top of a mountain somewhere, and spend my days hiking and teaching kids about space.

Learn more about Anna here!

If you check out Well Woman, this could be you.

Sometimes Barnard SGA meetings are pretty pointless—nothing gets learned, and nothing gets done. Last night was surprisingly different: Barnard Bureau Chief Dassi Karp reports on the good work of Nightline and Well Woman, as well as an exciting endowment proposal which hopes to increase the number of vegetables on campus.

Lena Denbro BC’19 and Albert Kohn GS/JTS’18, co-directors of Nightline, spoke about what Nightline’s purpose and how SGA can help. Nightline is an anonymous peer listening students run by Columbia undergraduates for Columbia undergraduates. They accept calls about any topic, every night. Listeners come from all four schools, and undergo a semester-long training and certification process. Denbro and Kohn are the only public figures of Nightline, and serve as the public ambassadors for their anonymous staff. Since they are public, they no longer answer the phones. Part of their presentation included addressing some common misconceptions about Nightline, one being that Nightline is mainly a type of suicide hotline. While listeners are prepared and have taken calls from suicidal students, these are only a small fraction of the calls they take. Usually, the co-directors explained, calls are about more everyday stressors, such as schoolwork and relationships. “There is truly no problem too big or too small,” Denbro emphasized. Additionally, Nightline Listeners do more than just listen. Kohn explained that callers can expect to have a genuine conversation. He acknowledged that “it is hard to pick up the phone, especially in those moments you’re feeling weak and unstable,” but encouraged students to do so anyway. Callers do not have to talk about anything they don’t want to, and can end the call whenever they want, “but sometimes just talking it out can really make a big difference.”

The Nightline directors asked SGA for help advertising. Unlike other clubs, most Nightline members cannot spread awareness of the service they offer, because they are anonymous. They also wanted support in becoming a more normalized resource on campus and getting included on lists of resources that are sent out by the administration. “I think that most students aren’t ready to call the Clinician On-Call,” said Kohn, adding that Nightline may be a good option for students, especially in difficult times, who don’t think they are in crisis but still need to talk. Denbro and Kohn also spoke about how there are all sorts of resources available for students who need them, both on-campus and off, and that sometimes students just need guidance about how to find those resources and make them work for them. They also had what I found to be a really insightful warning for those who have criticisms of health services on campus. Students should work to make these services better, they said, but must be careful to criticize in ways that are productive and does not discourage students from using these resources. Sure, people have problems with Furman—but people should still go. We have to be careful that in our efforts to make these services better, we don’t dissuade people from getting the help they need.

Learn more about SGA after the jump

As midterms season has started and now will never end, Bwogger Idris O’Neill has compiled a 2 hour playlist for your pre-emptive L. 

What’s Happening In The World: Reuters reports that Iran has been building up its military presence at bases in Syria for a possible war with Israel. By the way, the United States gives about $4 billion a year to Israel’s military, and both countries have nuclear weapons. It also isn’t clear who Russia would back. No, this doesn’t look bad at all… (Reuters)

This type of bones.

What’s Happening In The US: In unsurprising news, Mitt Romney has announced he’s running for the Utah senate seat left open by Orrin Hatch’s retirement. Slightly more interesting is that he accepted Trump’s endorsement after years of animosity between the two, but we all know Republicans have no spine. (Buzzfeed)

What’s Happening In NYC: Imagine living in your dorm room for four decades. That is a reality for nurse Derek DeFreitas, who has used a Hunter College room as a second home since 1980. According to a suit, it seems like Hunter finally got around to kicking him out, but what took so long? (NBC New York)

What’s Happening At Columbia: Today’s double entendre: The Department of Medicine is having a New York Bone Club meeting at the Marriott East Side tonight from 6:30 – 9. Go and flaunt your inner Ross Geller.

Overheard: “I couldn’t tie my shoes till I was 13. Don’t ask me to do anything.”