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David Helfand Leaves Columbia to Seek Truth

By Bwog Staff on Jul 19, 2011 34 Comments

Almost as famous for the epic proportions of his beard as for his pedagogy, the chair of the Astronomy department and Frontiers of Science mastermind Professor David Helfand will be relocating to Canada. It was reported Monday in a local newspaper in a remarkably hand-wavey way that “Helfand is now on a long term leave […]

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Harrison David Pleads Guilty, Sentenced to 3.5 Months in Jail

By Bwog Staff on Jul 19, 2011 61 Comments

This morning, Harrison David pleaded guilty to a felony charge in New York City Supreme Court. He will be sentenced on August 31st to 6 months of jail time (reduced to 4 for good behavior) at Rikers Island and 5 years of probation. Since he already served 2 weeks in Rikers Island before being released […]

operation ivy league

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Brown/White/Grey Hawk Down: Rest In Peace, Hawkma

By Bwog Staff on Jul 19, 2011 21 Comments

We’ve got some (potentially) sad news, folks. Hawkma’s reign over freshmen, upperclassmen, and faculty alike may have come to an end in the wee hours of the night. Though we can’t say for sure whether this is merely a Hawkmimposter, the slain bird does seem to resemble our robust, bloodthirsty friend. Tipster Ze’ev Gebler sent in […]

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I Laughed, I Cried!

By Bwog Staff on Jul 16, 2011 12 Comments

An anonymous tipster just let the more fortunate and securely-housed-since-April Bwog know that summer transfer assignments have been released. Go forth and find your fate. Update as of 07/18: Several commenters have replied that they have not yet received their new and improved homes. We can confirm that some have indeed already been released, so […]

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Boringside Heights: Bright, Shiny, and New

By Bwog Staff on Jul 16, 2011 15 Comments

The summer has been anything but dull in Morningside Heights. Perhaps the biggest news of all was the closing of H&H bagels, just downriver at 80th St. H&H was frequently cited as the top rival to our clearly superior Absolute for the best bagels on the Upper West Side, if not the entire city. Perhaps […]

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Overseen: Homeless Prefrosh Riot

By Bwog Staff on Jul 14, 2011 73 Comments

In an apparent effort to jade our incoming 2015 prefrosh before, rather than after, NSOP, Housing has already let down our youngsters. Last year, 14ers got their assignments on July 2nd. This year, Housing only finally released a few today—and then stopped. Predictably, a shitstorm ensued on the 2015 Facebook page. One student posted, “Housing […]

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Onwards and Upwards with CUArts

By Bwog Staff on Jul 12, 2011 7 Comments

It was announced today that Melissa Smey, Director of Miller Theatre, will be taking over leadership of Columbia’s Arts Initiative. In his university-wide e-mail, PrezBo praised Smey’s work in revamping Miller’s agenda — remember Sonic Youth? — which we chronicled in our profile of her in the November issue of The Blue & White. Bollinger, […]

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Own A Piece of History

By Bwog Staff on Jul 10, 2011 16 Comments

In 1951, Columbia teamed up with Harvey Comics to produce an anti-drug comic book called “Trapped.” And now it’s on eBay. You have just 2 hours and 36 minutes left to bid on what the seller promises is a “fine condition copy of this scarce early anti-drug effort with light cover wear!”

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1020 on the Big Screen

By Bwog Staff on Jul 07, 2011 21 Comments

1020 groupies rejoice! That booth where you had one too many tinis is now famous. The latest prep school misfits movie, The Art of Getting By, stars Emma Roberts (the one from Aquamarine—which maybe made you tear up that one time) and the Wes Anderson look-alike from the trippy version of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. Isn’t […]

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#ShouldHaveAskedObama

By Bwog Staff on Jul 06, 2011 33 Comments

We were going to launch a campaign to round up all you summer readers and bring this urgent question to the President’s attention. Then the heat got the better of us or something, but it’s the thought that counts right?

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BunsenBwog: Summer of Science

By Bwog Staff on Jun 30, 2011 18 Comments

Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean science isn’t happening at Columbia! Scientists at Columbia are growing heart and bone tissue. An NPR reporter went to the lab, interviewed researchers, and made a really cool and informative video about it that includes footage of heart tissue beating like a real heart. Perhaps most amazing is the […]

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John Coatsworth To Be Interim Provost

By Bwog Staff on Jun 29, 2011 9 Comments

President Bollinger just sent out an email announcing that John Henry Coatsworth, current Dean of SIPA and owner of the name to end all names, will assume the duties of University Provost starting July 1. With the recent loss of Claude Steele to Stanford, Coatsworth will serve as Interim Provost until PrezBo and “a small […]

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Live At Lerner: Plastic Cannons

Bwog Staff 1

hip!
live at lerner
midterms season gets to all of us
music
neato!
stress relief
take care of yourselves
young!

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Bwoglines: Is Everyone Drunk? Edition

Bwog Staff 1

~modernism~
bwog wrote this while not drunk
bwoglines
go away shia labeouf
technology is scary
vote darth vader

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Roommate Horror Stories

Bwog Staff 7

"he/she beats you up"
asking for mouthwash at 4 am
bad judgment calls
bwog would be a good roommate
crimes
don't be that person
leaving gross things in the shower
maybe it's because they got shafted
roommate-on-roommate struggle
sleep with one eye open folks
strangerphobic roommates
the ominous shower
what if we all lived in singles?
who sexiles and doesn't actually have sex?

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Free Comedy and Cheap Beer Tonight

Bwog Staff 5

$4 Coors can't beat that
comedy and beer equals great combination
control top
golden with a lot of foam
so alcohol very comedy
sounds yummy
study break
what's a well drink?

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PSA: Rules Of University Conduct Town Hall On Friday

Bwog Staff 0

havemeyer 309
revising the rules of protest
town halls
University Rules of Conduct
usenate

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Overseen: If You Give A Mouse A Cookie…

Bwog Staff 0

ewwwww
i only want a glass of milk
if you give a mouse a cookie
just take my cookie and leave me alone!
mice here mice there mice are crawling everywhere
red linoleum floors
stay under that chair!
UTS
vermin

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Bwoglines: WTF??? Edition

Bwog Staff 0

bwog is never flying American Airlines ever
bwoglines
fix your planes
Google is solving everyone's biggest problems
holy shit 4000 people
Kim Jung Un looks even more dangerous with a cane
no more going to the good ol' doc
planes falling apart from the inside
telemedicine
to be clear: when we say "wtf" we mean "what the fuck?"

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Field Notes: What (Who) Did You Go Home With This Weekend?

Lili Brown 1

"projects" seriously what are these this is not seventh grade
and a traffic cone: sounds like a good weekend to us
butt hurt is that still a phrase
cava
foosball
gilmore girls
the real camus
three blocks with this under your arm
will the real camus please stand up

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