Ladies and gentlemen: the first snow penis of 2012, erected proudly in the lawn in front of Hartley.

Make a wish!

It’s finals season, and you probably can’t help but compare this year’s experience with previous years—was I better prepared? Did I just have a lighter courseload? Hey, when did I stop getting laid?

If you’re anything like Bwog, you also miss another fundamental institution often associated with finals: snow. So instead of studying for that 1004 final, we threw together and present to you the following way to relieve a little stress and play in the snow, if only digitally. So draw something below! Go wild! If you make a creation you’re particularly proud of, take a screenshot and share it in the comments.

Digital canvas via Drew Gereats

‘Tis the season for holiday cheer, tip-toeing around religious conventions, and finals, so huddle around the nearest heater (how is it still fifty degrees outside!?), fix yourself a cup of hot cocoa, and get studying, because December is here!

As winter makes an early appearance, unsuspecting Californians are plagued by this foreign phenomenon known as “snow”.

Girl wearing a light hoodie and Toms, being carried on piggie back, screams:

“Awwww I hate cold, I wanna go home! I want California!”

Perhaps she was astonished at snowperson and his/her pet?

Grab your sled, build a snowman, and roast some chestnuts, it’s snowing! This morning, Columbia has woken up to the first flurry of the season— which by the looks of it, is slowly turning into a blizzard. Join Bwog in putting your boots on and being jolly. Picture submissions welcome!

While you slept a slushpocalypse swept away the spring that almost was:

Bwog decrees the 2011 battle has begun. Get your asses out there!

Go get ‘em! Remember, as of right now, classes aren’t canceled, but the University does say that “conditions are subject to change.”

Snow promises great things and while scattered cries for a snowball fight didn’t materialize today, we do have a few pictures of the sights the fresh snowfall brought with it.

Photos by Evelyn Warner.

Stay warm and sweet dreams, all.

Peter Sterne snapped these delightful shots of campus last night. In case you haven’t noticed, Bwog loves snow—remember when?! In an effort to recapture a small amount of that epic rejoicing, we’d like to collect a multitude of snow pics—either from campus if you’re back already, from elsewhere in New York, or your own hometown if it’s covered in a blanket of beautiful white. Go forth and frolic! Snow angels, icicles, igloos, we’ll take ‘em all at tips@bwog.com.

Let this astounding shot from Spokane, by Bwog’s Evergreen Correspondent Mark Hay, be your inspiration:

6-10 inches of delicious

Snowpocalypse 2011! Blizzardgeddon 2: Electric Boogaloo! In case you haven’t heard, the worst snowstorm this year has ever seen will hit New York tonight and bring a whopping… eh, 6-10 inches of snow.

But still, perhaps learning from Mayor Mike, Columbia is taking a few more precautions this time, issuing the following alert. Friends on campus, take note:

The University expects to maintain normal business operations tomorrow, Jan. 12.

However, given the probability of significant snowfall, only the gates at 116th Street at Broadway and Amsterdam Avenue will remain open on the Morningside campus starting Tuesday evening.

We encourage everyone to check back here for updates about the University’s status and schedule. Should there be any weather related closures or cancellations, they will be posted on the Columbia homepage at www.columbia.edu and the CUMC homepage at www.cumc.columbia.edu. Alternatively, you may call 212-854-1754 for the Morningside campus or 212-305-7300 for the Medical Center for updates.

As if our campus had a lot of shortcuts to begin with…

Crazy snow of apocalyptic proportions (“thundersnow“?) hit New York yesterday. Assuming your family is already getting on your nerves, here are a few glimpses of Columbiana to help you forget the hell of finals and idealize school again. Bwog woke to the sound of sleds scraping along the sidewalk. Hot cocoa in hand, we’re heading to the Hill.

Night photo by Patrick Stahl, others by DH

It was like this

Bwog’s Holiday Cheer Leader Peter Sterne reports.

As the first snowfall (flurries don’t count) of the year descended into Morningside Heights last night, students gathered on the Lerner Ramps and outside Roone, eager to see the latest edition of XMAS!, the VShow-like student-run musical that’s been satirizing the holiday season for the last five years. When the audience was finally let into Roone, they found the speakers blared the Maccabeats’ “Candlelight.” It was an interesting introduction to a show that spent the next two hours poking fun at corporate culture, hipsters, Jews, gays, and New Jersey, before tying it all up with the saccharine moral that XMAS is for everyone and it will always be around.

The show begins in a boardroom in XMAS, Inc., where recently hired hotshot executive William (Andrew Wright, CC ’14) is upstaging power-mad CEO Thurston Wallace I (Thomas Spry, CC ’14), who bought Christmas from Santa Claus back in the 1980s. Spry channels Jacobim Mugatu more than Gordon Gekko in his portrayal of Thurston, and the camp he brings to his character’s prima-donna personality and deliciously evil scheming are a delight to watch onstage. Once he decides that William may be a threat, he forces his poor elf assistant, Sprinkles (the phenomenal Emily Wallen, BC ’11), to lure him to a warehouse in Hoboken.

Though she’s only a supporting actor, Wallen is really the heart and soul of this play. She shines during the musical performances, effortlessly able to command the stage during a solo. More importantly, she brings an endearing awkward schtick to her character Sprinkles, who’s torn between her good conscience and the realities of working for XMAS, Inc. Surely, some of Sprinkles’ charm comes courtesy of brilliant writers (“What else can I do? Merrill Lynch isn’t exactly hiring elves and I can’t join the military because of ‘Don’t Ask Don’t Telf!’”). But it is Wallen’s delivery that brings her character alive. Even when she tricks William and locks him the Hoboken warehouse, the audience remains sympathetic to her plight. Read more…

We have a winner! Jody Zellman captured the first flakes! “The scourge is here,” Jody writes in his winning email.

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Look closely!

And a few more snowflakes courtesy of Hans Hyttinen:

This is not what Central Park looked like yesterday.

CTV goes to the Jon Stewart rally, speaks with Ariana Huffington, and asks a small child, “What’s your greatest fear? Is it public speaking?” Be sure to watch the video. (CTV)

Board of Trustees chair William V. Campbell is advising on a new web browser called RockMelt, which is designed to better incorporate social media into the browser interface. (NYT)

NY1 picks up a Public Safety warning. Watch out for this guy. (NY1)

Snow fell in four of the five boroughs yesterday. So Global Warming must be wrong. (Daily News)

A jury in Connecticut voted to impose the death penalty yesterday for the brutal murder of three women in their home. (NYT)

Image via Wikimedia Commons

This week, it rains. It also might be sunny, but Accuweather has been changing its mind a lot. We can say this, at the very least: don’t expect snow. Bwog thanks Kim Lessing from the bottom of our hearts for her beautiful camera. Zak Dychtwald is a supreme editor and cameraman. Pat Blute is very funny. Enjoy! And if you’d like Pat to report the weather from your event/group meeting/dorm room, email us at tips@bwog.com.