No rest for the wicked

4/30 blaze it

Last Friday marked the last day you could add a class without the instructor’s permission, AKA the last day of the Change of Program Period. While there are still course selection-adjacent deadlines coming up (February 20 is the last day to drop a class for CC, GS, and Barnard students; March 22 is the same for SEAS, as well as the deadline for all schools to change a course’s grading to Pass/D/Fail), most of us should have our schedules firmed up by now. So we were curious: what do the students of Columbia think of their schedules for this semester? Bwog scattered to the four corners of Morningside Heights, Bwog Asked, and Bwog Received:

• “I like my schedule! I was able to fit my work-study in the mornings and do all my classes in the afternoon.”
• “No. I have a big-ass gap every single day between classes, so I end up taking a fat nap instead of doing any work. I’m fucked.”
• “Classes are good but [I] ended up with a 9 am lab and a class at the Arts Center on 125th with a professor who is really punctual.”
• “Eh could be better but my love life could be better as well.”
• “My roommate’s friend says no, my roommate says it’s a lot but she’s happy.”
• “After two petitions and several frantic emails before course application deadlines, yes.”
• A Bwogger’s roommate: “No because all my stuff ends at 5:30 and I don’t have any time where I can just relax.”
• “No Friday classes!”
• “Yeah, it gets a bunch of stuff that I need to do out of the way, none of my classes are too late—even though it’s busy it’s not unreasonable.”
• “Kind of: I like my classes, but I have 6:10-8:00 pm classes almost every day so my dinner schedule is fucked.”
• “I’m always a mess…do you think this semester is anything different? My schedule reflects my life.”
• A Bwogger asked this question in a groupchat with a friend who’s on medical leave. His reply: “My schedule is really bringing me down right now. All of my professors are me…and I’m a dick so that’s a whole issue. I read up all my own evaluations, I’m late with homework, and I rarely grade assignments. Not to mention the nepotism involved when all of the students are 100% blood related to the professor…I mean that’s just asking for trouble.”
• “No, but it is what it is.”

The promised land…

Late on a weekend night, there’s only one reason that anyone would be heading up onto the bridge over Amsterdam: East Campus. But not all those who enter the lobby can get in. CC and SEAS students slide past without trouble, while others stand patiently for long minutes, sometimes even hours, until they can find some friend or friendly stranger to sign them in. Earlier tonight, we took to that very lobby to ask the people waiting there what they would do in that moment in order to secure one elusive EC sign-in. Here are some of our favorite responses:

• “I’d wait for five minutes.”
• “I’d suck a dick.”
• “Suck a dick twice”
• “Go outside naked.”
• “Honestly, after like ten minutes, I’d just give up.”
• “Go up to random people and ask them for a sign in.”
• “Venmo people.”
• “I would send a text to my boyfriend.”
• “Eat five cooked eggs.”
• “Freshman year, I’d just go up to people and be like, do you live here, can you sign me in, I could give you a blowjob real fast.”
• “Suck a dick.”
• “Teach someone how to use the Diana.”
• “Not much, honestly.”

Photo via Bwog Staff

Roar, lions, roar

Once upon a time, Bwog stopped writing about the f-word. Since last year, though, we are once again recognizing that the football team exists. We took to Butler tonight to ask the library-dwellers what they think about Columbia’s homecoming win yesterday (more comprehensive homecoming coverage to come tomorrow–our resident bandies/sports writers are still recovering).

Butler 2

• “Nothing.”
• “I was so shocked–it was really unexpected and made the homecoming experience so much better.”
• “I regret not going.”
• “That’s nice for them.
• “I slept through it because I was in Butler until 5am on Friday.”
• “What sport?”

Butler 3

• “Is this important?”
• “Thank you, Columbia, for winning my senior homecoming!”
• “…Yay.”

Butler 4

• “When I found out, I peed myself.”
• “It’s cool, I guess.”
• “I write for Spec.”

Butler 6

• “What’s Dartmouth?
• “In the nicest possible way, I don’t care.”
• “We beat Dartmouth–it’s not much of an achievement. But we need more school spirit.”

Butler 8

• “Fuck Cornell.” “It was Dartmouth we beat.” “Fuck Dartmouth.”

You after your midterms.

If you didn’t read our post heralding the arrival of Autumn yesterday, this question might serve as a seasonal shock. Well, it might serve as a shock, regardless. Fall color, after all, is so blasé—just like all the people responding “pumpkin spice”. There’s no other way to describe the complete and utter dominance of consumerism in our “culture”.

Outside Butler

“Pumpkin spice lube.”

“No.”

“Menthol.”

Butler Cafe

“McDonald’s apple pie. Oh, and hotdogs.”

“Salted caramel.”

“SAGE!”

“You guys are all naming scents. Mine? Mine is cinnamon.”

“Apple cider mimosa.”

“Flavor? Hmmmm those new Starbucks flavors are good.”

“A chili vodka margarita I had the other night.”

More sensual flavours after the jump

JJ’s also has a new ping pong table – and according to one person we talked to, it isn’t regulation

In case you’re a first-year, a transfer, or someone with no friends at Barnard: it was announced last spring that Barnard students are now able to swipe into JJ’s as part of their meal plans. When one Bwog staff writer ventured into JJ’s last week, she overheard two Columbia students behind her in line for chicken nuggets complaining that JJ’s is now incredibly crowded due to an influx of Barnard students. We became curious to see how popular this opinion was, so we took Bwog Asked to JJ’s last night. We asked: “How do you feel about the fact that Barnard students can now swipe into JJ’s?” Here are our answers.

Columbia (CC and SEAS) students:

• “Now they can finally see how not that exciting it is.”
• “I think it’s awesome, I think everyone should have access to it.”
• “It’s lit.”
• “I really don’t care – if it’s more convenient for them, then why not.”
• “I didn’t know they couldn’t before, but I’m glad they can now.”
• “I thought it was kind-of asshole-y when they didn’t let [Barnard students] in.”
• “I don’t think it’s been more crowded because of Barnard students … The John Jay line has been worse than normal, too. It’s just the freshmen.”
• “Spread the fried chicken love.”
• “I’m happy for them. I don’t know much about Barnard’s dining options, but I think they should have access to food as much as Columbia students do.”
• “I don’t care. It’s fine. Can you make the title of the article ‘JJs needs better food’?”
• “I think it’s great, because this place is cool.”
• “I’m just glad my Barnard friends still talk to me now that they don’t need sign-ins.”

A typical Barnard-student-swipes-self-into-JJ’s experience

Barnard students:

• “Yas. Spelled y-a-s.”
• “We’re Barnard students, you can tell.  We’re like, here we are, we’re excited to be alive.”
• “We should get swipe access to the dorms next.”
• “It feels really empowering.”
• “Thank you, Columbia, for finally making us feel like we matter.”
• “I’m genuinely scared. Because when I was a freshman, I couldn’t go to JJ’s, and I avoided the freshman fifteen. But now the freshman fifteen is gonna come again. Only it’s gonna be the junior fifteen. Or even worse – the junior twenty-five.”

Conclusion: Most Columbia students are either happy for their Barnard friends, or don’t particularly care about the change. And Barnard students are excited at the novelty of greasy food until 2am right now – but within a few weeks, they’ll likely realize that JJ’s is just another dining hall. And a dining hall of questionable quality, at that. Perhaps this new JJ’s policy is doing what administrators have failed at for years: bridging the gap between Columbia and Barnard once and for all.

Images via Bwog Staff

Literally us today, but we’re hoping for the metaphor soon.

Last night, seemingly in honor of Bacchanal’s end, every natural force came together for a wild thunderstorm. Benches were blown over. Tree branches snapped. People slept even worse than they would have with the aid of Bacch-related extreme alcohol consumption. The morning after, we woke up with some regrets about yesterday’s events. We wished some things would just disappear. So what’s it gonna be? We took to Butler to find out.

The Lobby

• “Donald trump’s hair”
• “Oh my gosh, I don’t have a funny answer!”
• “All my troubles”
• “Bwog.”

ButCaf

• “All of my regrets from yesterday”
• “The cold weather”
• “The person who asked me this question”

But 209

• “My problem set”
• “Everyone’s Canada goose jackets”
• “Butler, please”

But 401

• “My 65-page thesis.”
• “Vomit stains.”
• “My confidence”

Sixth floor

• “I don’t understand. Can you translate in French.”
• “Donald trump”
• “Misogyny”
• “Bollinger”

Ref room

• “The tiny statue.”
• “The winter weather”
• “Me.”

Windy via Wikimedia Commons

This could be you but you studying.

In honor of the Academy Awards happening tonight, but more importantly in honor of the Red Carpet happening before (be honest, what do you care about more?), Bwog has decided to do its second round of Oscar-related Bwog Asked. We headed to Butler to see what our fellow classmates had to say.

Outside

• “Forever 21 tbh.”
• “I think I stole this top actually.”
• “My mom got these [jeans] for me at a thrift store so idk.”

The Lobby

• “Columbia, Express, Aldo, the socks are… champion.”
• “Nike hoodie, nike sweats, and nike shoes.”
• “Ugh…just like…items I threw together.”

ButCaf

• “Oh, this old thing? Abercrombie kids. Boy’s fall season premier sweater. But from 2004.”
• “A power outfit for studying for my midterm tomorrow. I might end up wearing it to my midterm, too…” [wearing Abercrombie and ripped sweatpants]

Get higher education in Butler next

But how can TLOP tour top this performance?

It was due time to bring back Bwog Asked for this semester, and what better way to begin than with a topical topic. Kanye has just dropped The Life of Pablo, currently exclusively available on Tidal. So, what do students think of the new album? Do they love it? Hate it? How many students even know about it? We ventured into Butler (and beyond) in order to find out.

In front of Butler:

• “Fuck Tidal.”
• “What? Oh, The Life of Pablo? I haven’t seen it yet.”
• “It’s illuminati bullshit, I’m waiting for the stream to drop somewhere else”
• “There are multiple explanations of it?”
• *NYU student outside of Butler* “Kantye”

ButCaf:

• “Typical Kanye……I wasn’t surprised but I was impressed.”
• “It’s about the apostle Paul.”

Lobby:

• “I like it.”
• “What do I think about the life of Pablo? I’m cool.”
• “I hope he’s doing well”
• “I feel like I can’t really comment.”

Second floor:

• “Waaaaaaves. Waaaaaaves.”
• “Did it come out? I haven’t listened to it.”
• “We have to dispel the myth that Kanye West doesn’t know what he’s doing.”

Third floor:

• “I think……….. he’s a genius”
• “I don’t follow rap.”
• “Life of who? Paco?”
• “Can you send me the download link”
• “Oh ya, I don’t like Kanye”

Ref:

• “KANYE WEST MAKES REAL MUSIC. BEST RAPPER IN THE GAME.”
• “I didn’t know who Pablo was”
• “I hate Kanye”
• “I would like it if he didn’t sing.”
• “Is he the one who named his kid North West?”

Conversations we didn’t even prompt but just walked in on:

• (In the elevator) “Kanye now calls himself Pablo. You should follow Kylie Jenner on snapchat she’s staging a whole melodrama with her and Kim and Kanye.”
• (At a table in 211) “I heard its good. I’m not that big of a fan.”
• (Lobby) “For real though there are some bangers.”

Yeezus via Heather Byrd/CC-BY-2.0

Dave’s brownies + birthday wishes at ButCafé.

Remember when Bwog turned 10? Remember when we changed our logo, posted a lot of cool articles, and reminisced about the beginning of the internet? It was great, and to perpetuate the nostalgia, here’s a Bwog Asked from patrons of ButCafé on what they think of Bwog now. The staffer who gathered these responses noted: “These responses are still better than some of the things my brother has written in my birthday cards tbh.” Alas.

“It’s alright.”
“I think the senior wisdoms are really funny.”
“Spec has better articles.”
“Mostly gossip.”
“I hate Bwog.”
“I don’t know I don’t read it often .”
“I like how it’s always been a good place to get quick campus news? Yea Bwog is alright.”
“It used to be funnier.”
“Is Bwog the one with the crown?”

Image via Bwog

Goals, though.

We know it’s cheesy to talk about the weather, but we’re going to do it anyway. If you’ve ventured outside in the past couple days, you may have noticed a new chill in the air. With the onset of autumn (the equinox was on Wednesday, y’all!!!), Bwog decided to get the scoop on the upcoming styles on campus.

Hallways:

• “I have a pair of Clark boots I really like.”
• “I usually just wear my rain boots … and like, maybe flannels.”
• “A trench coat and khakis.”
• “Leggings and a sweatshirt, it’s the way to go.”

Front desk access attendant:

• “A nice vest.”

First floor:

• “Lots of earthy tones.”
• “Maroon is really in right now.”
• “Shirts with programming jokes on them.”
• “Structured sweater jackets.”
• “Umbrellas, rain boots, wellies.”

What did the rest of Butler say?

Where is it, though?

Now that school has begun and Butler has resumed its identity as a safe haven for stressed out students, Bwog decided now is the perfect time to interrupt those studies on a Sunday night, in order to bring you the latest in text messaging news on campus. We snuck into Butler to investigate. What we received were a wide variety of responses, from a wide variety of people, from food thieves to fuckbois. 

2nd floor

• “I’ve failed you. But in a lot of ways, I also failed myself. Are you both going to ADP tonight?”
• “OMG hahahahaha. what a turd”
• “Nah i have no time… i’ll probs just bring Tupperware to john jay tbh”
• “hey my roommate is out. wanna sleep over?

3rd floor

• “SHE IS LISTENING TO EVERYTHING WE SAY WHAT DO I DO”
• “Happy national fuckboi day”
• “K. Did you see my Hillel text?”
• “Just #nerdy things”
• “come tonight and cherish in pregame galore!”

4th floor

• “and somehow we’re the real losers.”
• “Wanna smoke now actually… Riverside?”
• “which location of old spice!”
• “Can you sign me in?”

Read more responses after the jump!

Studying in Butler Cafe like

In honor of spending the next 4 hours in Butler tonight’s Academy Awards / Oscars (which one is it?), we thought it would be fitting to ask people in and around the Butler Library area who they were wearing. From smokers to campers, here are their responses.

Outside

• “Canada Goose. Sorry.” (we forgive you)
• “Columbia gear.”
• “Hanes sweats.”
• *girl outside Butler looking lost & confused* “I’m wearing Ann Taylor Loft socks.”

Butler Café

• “Bell bottoms and mustard tee from No relation thrift store (the greatest thrift store you will ever go to) on 12th and 1st avenue and a brown suede men’s Levi jacket. This is so awesome. You made my night.”
• “Forever 21, Gap…Uhh a coat from China, you wouldn’t know the brand.”

The Elevators

• “Um, no one?”
• “My ex-boyfriend’s sweatshirt.”
• “My study clothes.” (what does this even mean?)

Butler 2, 3 & 4

• “I’m not sure…I guess Gap.”
• “The student council of my old high school.”
• “Abercrombie and Fitch.”
• “The Columbia bookstore.”

The Diana Center

• “Something I bought four years ago.”
• “My roommate’s clothes.”
• “I’m not actually familiar with these questions…”
• “Salvation Army.”
• “Democracy Now hoodie.”
• “You wanna check my tag?”
• “Gap. Not Kids.”

Wearing Last Night’s H&M Dress via Shutterstock

What we wore to see Fifty Shades of Grey

While Valentine’s Day may be drifting into the past, the scratch marks on your back hickey on your neck is here to stay. Wondering if everyone else got more action than Bwog this holiday weekend, we sent staff members into Butler this evening to find out how the rest of the student body spent their V-Day.

Lobby

• “Went to dinner with friends.”
• *Public Safety Officer* “Valentine’s Day is just another day because I’m old, man.”
• “Hung out with a ‘friend.’ We watched some action movie.”

Butler Cafe

• “Relaxed and hung out with my girlfriend.”
• “Pretty well. I’ve been dating my girlfriend for two years. We went downtown.”
• *Guy #1 laughing* “At home. That’s it. He has a girlfriend.” *points to Guy #2*
• *Guy #2, also laughing* “I think I had a good night.”

2nd Floor

• “Worked.”
• “It was great. I finished my Lit Hum reading.”
• “My girlfriend and I went to an art museum. Then we ate sushi and watched Animal House.”
• “I am not ashamed of what I did on Valentine’s Day.”
• *208 Desk Attendant* “Watched WALL·E alone.”
• “Hung out with friends.”
• “I went out to dinner.”

But who went to see Fifty Shades of Grey???

Bwog has given up and has decided to try the book hat technique

It’s the least wonderful time of the year (again) and Bwog ventured into the depths of Butler to ask how Midterms are treating Columbia’s students. Judging by the disgruntled answers and the atmosphere of anxiety and cigarette smoke, y’all are barely hanging on.

Lobby

• “Don’t care, not really stressed because I’m a Creative Writing major”

Elevator

• “I don’t actually have midterms (this week).”

Cafe

• Cute German guy in line for coffee at butler: “I study a lot. Drink a lot of coffee.” (He then proceeds to show us a magic trick… Randomly awesome person or pickup artist extraordinaire?)

3rd Floor

• Guy behind the reference desk: “it’s going ok… I’ve had one…. No wait, two midterms, so kinda stressful but doing ok.”
• Guy wearing no shoes outside 301: “I don’t have any midterms till next week so… That doesn’t really apply to me.”

Random Locations

• “shittily” – deeply concerned looking guy
• “midterms? Ha. thats why i just take seminars.”- business casually clad girl
• “ughhhhhhhhhhhh” – person sitting next to business casually clad girl
• “Great. I like to think critically and delve deep into a topic…were you looking for drama?” – Exchange student getting coffee (then proceeded to show us a magic trick with cards and fire wtf)
• “Fine but I need to get back to this email. Bye.” – stressed looking guy on his laptop
• “Don’t talk about them or I have to acknowledge they exist.” – girl with nothing apart from her phone
• “Not sure…” – very confused looking guy with calculus homework
• “Shit. Like really shitty. Really really shitty.” – guy wearing red wristband with “fuck it” written on it

Midterm fashion via Shutterstock.

Bwog could have used that hour productively

We all felt the wrath of losing an extra hour of sleep last night that we could have desperately used with the encroaching week of hell. In times of distress, it is best to know that you are not alone; everyone else is equally pissed (or happy?) In order to further make people listen to us talk about this whole “springing forward” situation, Bwoggers scurried through Butler tonight to ask the patrons how they felt about springing forward.

Butler Cafe

• “Horrible. I got three hours of sleep.”
• “Abolish it now, like Arizona”

2nd Floor