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Bwoglines: Politrick(s) or Treat Edition

It's not Halloween yet, you say? Then how do you explain this grab bag of political updates...?

 

Clever costume ideas via Wikimedia Commons.

Bwoglines: 9/11 Anniversary Edition

In case you forgot to read these yesterday.

Yesterday we joined our country to remember the events of September 11, 2001. Bwog was impressed, inspired, and engaged by media coverage of the 10-year anniversary. If you missed yesterday’s headlines, here are a few pieces worth reading.

Stack of print journalism via Wikimedia Commons.

Morning Roundup: Pet Name Wanted

Bwog is still searching its Cabinet of Cleverness for a new name for the expanded morning news post.  Share your ideas in the comments.

cat at sunriseYesterday the Museum of the City of New York opened a new exhibit celebrating the city’s “ultimate movers and shakers” in the last 400 years.  But where is PrezBo in the list? (Museum of the City of New York)

MMA wants to meet everyone and see everything.  She’s even planning office hours! (Spec)

Everyone’s pointing fingers downtown.  One day before memorial services begin, construction on the Freedom Tower 1 World Trade Center has halted. (NY1)

Apparently there are people who actually read the emailed security alerts.  Advice: don’t let sketchy people follow you into buildings. (Spec)

Dancers took over Sixth Avenue Wednesday night for the VMA rehearsals.  Cabbies were shaking fists but tourists were snapping pics.  Dr. Clarke was nowhere to be seen. (MTV)

Image via Flickr

AltSpec: Lost Hope, Stretched Trope

It’s time for AltSpec once again, in which Bwog reminds you that you’re far less successful than your esteemed colleagues.

h1n1 rap screenshotPiglet flu took down Big Red and now it’s bearing down on light blue.  Thankfully, “Dr. John Clarke” has some nearly-rhyming advice to avoid the sniffles.

Remember that you can always validate your choice of major with a hint of economics.  Job market be damned, let’s all learn a dead language.

The last person to save Columbia from perpetual embarrassment decided his time was better spent steering engineers than Lions.

With our growing debt, we’re all going to be manic-depressives by the time we’re thirty, guaranteeing a similar fate for our alien mutants children.

The New York Times uses the cover of a restaurant “review” to spy on an unsuspecting Columbia couple eating lunch. “I’m already turning elitist” cries one, hiding his pride.  Photo via YouTube.

–AB

AltSpec: Pride, Prejudice, and Parasites

It was this man’s vision to lead SEAS, of all things.

Columbia grads spawn from the east coast to represent the entire country around the world.

Green monkeys.  Chalfie’s dream finally comes to pass.

We’re far too busy cleaning up to fix the problem.

Back in the day, anti-Semitism was endemic.

It’s Ebola, but it’s not ebola.

This school may not have decent sports, but it offers solace to those who picked champion institutions.

AltSpec: Procrastination Alert

1968 low policeThanks to one of the few female graduates in the early days of the law school, copyright law was blessed with the “fair use” clause.  Here’s to in-class movies and music.

Measles, mumps, and rubella are frightening now, but as a child you would have preferred putting off your immunization visits to being saved from disease.

A ‘72er (not to be confused with a ’68er) has some words of wisdom for ambitious New School and NYU “protesters.”

The adults have found out about college kids’ drug of choice.  Run!

Professors will get even less work done next semester.  The world’s largest collection of pop music since the 1950′s will be available for use by Columbia professors soon.

AltSpec: What Goes Around Comes Around

Image via toyrific.co.uk

Stop panicking about lil’ piggy flu.  We’ve found a way to make it politically incorrect.

The only reason we have a potential pandemic is all those corrupt doctors.  Free Viagra be damned, we want our vaccine!

The 2013′s are signing away their souls (on Facebook).  Columbia has the fewest downsides—compared to Cornell.

Hopefully they’ll face better economic times.  One Columbia graduate has found fame in, erm, illicit affairs.

For the rest of us, Yankees’ seats are becoming more affordable (if you were paying thousands of dollars to begin with).

Leave all of that behind.  If you’re stuck at home because the big, bad economy took your job, rest assured that it’s the best for your GPA.

AltSpec: Let’s Play a Game

Match the quote to the speaker.  To give you a break from problem sets, it should be pretty easy, but answers after the jump anyway.  Good luck!

Quotes

Speakers

“[I]t was like a national day of protest.  There was a counterculture dimension to it.” Roberta Balstad, Center for Research on Environmental Decisions
“…hardly principles on which normal market economics is based.” Barack Obama, CC ’83
“They basically set her up.” Steve Cohen, Executive Director of the Earth Institute
“It’s one of those events that is of low probability but high consequence.  The consequences could be extreme.” Joseph Stiglitz, Professor and Nobel Prize winner
“[Colleges need] to put affordability front and center as they chart a path forward.” Paul Giacomo Jr., Attorney

 

Answers after the jump! (more…)

AltSpec: We Have the Technology

ZekeAnother blog has discovered our friend Sarah Dooley.  Yes, her character is a lot like Michael Scott, but so much cuter!

A Columbia grad student played in that intertubes-inspired concert at Carnegie Hall: “I haven’t hardly played at all.”

Drought in Africa: yes, it could happen, and it’s happened before: “startling.”

Ever wonder what happens in that underground lab by Avery?  It’s the behavioral labs for the Center for Research on Environmental Decisions.  A reporter discloses the horrors within.

Studying at a university that crushes your self-esteem, remind yourself now and again that you have skills.  It’ll raise your grades by one third of a grade.  Hopefully.  Maybe.

The J-School, with PrezBo’s impetus, is leading the way in adapting its curriculum to the post-print world.  In love with newsprint?  First, learn Photoshop.

The world’s largest collection of pop music is now available for your perusal at a library near you.  Hopefully, most of it is pre-Britney.

News flash: Ivy League tuition is expensive.  So we’ve signed up for a government supplement fund to help GI’s complete their education here.

AltSpec: The Economy Has Pierced Our Bubble

The weekly “Gee, really?” news of the week: replacing soda with water is healthy.   In fact, water even has fewer calories.

The Chronicle is careful not to judge when reporting on Massad’s probable tenure.  It’s just been a “rocky road,” but not the delicious kind.

Harvard was mentioned in global media more often than Columbia last year.  A quick, biased investigation suggests that it was merely to save newsprint; “Harvard” has one fewer letter.

Finely-aged conservatives whine about kids these days.  We’re “radicals,” “attacking” the social order.  Imagine the bridge club chaos that would ensue if the status quo were altered.

Payouts and salaries are dropping across the board, but publishers are desperate.  Meghan McCain’s book was just sold for “high six figures” in an auction.  Of course, nobody seems to know exactly what the book will be about.

Journalism’s flailing has been a gift for the J-School: the number of applicants has soared and the number of entry-level jobs is expected to increase, as well.  Veteran reporters, no longer employed, are turning to academia for fulfillment.

AltSpec: Potpourri

At the Double Discovery center, they confirm and reconfirm that dating abuse is just not okay.

Our pediatric neuroscience department was managed by a fraudster.  John Bzdil pleaded guilty on Tuesday for defrauding Columbia for $180,000 used for personal expenses.

Miller Theatre has a “new” director.  Granted, she was the acting director since October.

A Columbian is related to the host of the most listened-to radio show in America.  “Now please stop judging me by my last name.”

Senior Justin Floyd revealed his taste for conservative dress to Meredith Vieira.

AltSpec: An Urban Revolution

Irvine R. Levine, style guru, insisted on his bowties and the use of his middle initial during his forty-five years at NBC.

The former Weatherman and 1968 revolutionary Mark Rudd has released his new memoir, but The Wall Street Journal is far from impressed.

An oddly-specific study shows that fast food makes people fat.  For 50%, never fear: aerobics improves male heart health only (sorry, Barnard).

Columbia is making peace with the neighborhood, and UTS is making peace with the earth.

The man is frightened that Wikipedia will mean academic demise.  Revolt, peons – Britannica calls your name.

AltSpec: Near, Far, Wherever You Are

Celine Dion
 Photo via Wikipedia

Locally – Our women’s archery coach demonstrates that arrows can indeed puncture humans.

Internationally – We’re not opening international campuses, just research facilities.  All the glory, none of the undergrads.

Internally – All those Twinkies in your college diet will make you forget everything you’ve learned.

Virtually – He got a journalism Master’s here, now he’s reinventing the editorial(izing) process.  And he’s not writing for Bwog.

Underwater – Yes, the glaciers really are melting.  We’re just double-triple-checking.

AltSpec: Searching For the Answer


To exams:
Who were you fooling with all of those hours you spent in Butler last week? Not the good people at Cramster.com, apparently — the cheatsheet site reports more traffic from Columbia than any other school. So this is how you were using those WiFi maps.

To global warming: Emitted in Texas, sequestered in Memphis? A new map shows where rocks can store excess carbon dioxide. Watch out, Sprayregen: Columbia’s moving into the storage business, too.

To fat kids: The closer the fast food, the fatter the students. Considering the nearest McDonald’s is about five blocks from campus, Columbia might be in the clear, but just think what obesity rates must be like at Hamburger University

To costly journalism: Attention, bankrupt media outlets! The J-School wants your tired, your poor, your huddled masses yearning for a paycheck. Provided they submit three clips and a cover letter, of course.

To low attendance: People do actually watch sports at Columbia. Particularly women’s basketball. If you don’t believe us, check out this nifty press release.

AltSpec: Haphazard Verdicts
angry judge
 Image via blogspot.com

Real estate is a steal: PrezBo’s henchmen nabbed two new buildings this past week.  One can reasonably assume that the Manhattanville location will be absorbed into our financially-delayed behemoth.  But the 113th Street purchase?  It’d make a killer residence hall.

Impossible decisions are everywhere: Change we need, but probably not that we can believe in.  Poor Barack wishes the Guantanamo detainees would just vanish like as Flex has.

Stiglitz is, like, famous: And the economy is in such bad shape that he’s reduced to name-dropping dead guys.  Like this guy he knew at Yale, who didn’t agree with him.  But that was then.

Celebrities also make mistakes: Hermione may not be gracing us with her presence in the fall, despite our hopes to see someone other than Franco that other crime-ridden city wants her.

Correlation is causation: Marked by the disappearance of a certain feathered friend, the severity of heart attacks has been on the decline (for people who don’t have midterms).

Your money is gone: PrezBo won’t be winning his money back any time soon, since in the effort to reduce meaningless securities lawsuits, they made it harder to file meaningful ones.  A Columbia law professor has a possible workaround, but MrsBo will still be mad.