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Professor Archetypes: The Language Prof Who Just Doesn’t Speak English

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 10 Comments

As long as schools like Columbia champion the “sink-or-swim” school of language instruction, you will inevitably come into contact with, whether in fulfilling your requirement or just being intellectually curious, the Language Professor Who Does Not Speak English. This professor can exist in any language department. The idea of this professor is that you are […]

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BwogSalon: Sanctum

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 24 Comments

Bwog has hopped, poked, and swiftly skimmed, but now we’re inviting other writers into the Bwog Bubble. We think there’s lots of fantastic campus journalism out there that sometimes slips under the radar. In the spirit of Enlightenment salons from centuries past, we present our newest feature, BwogSalon. Bwog asked the editors of each publication […]

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Frontiers Of Science: It Ain’t Poetry

By Bwog Staff on Dec 19, 2010 23 Comments

Freshpeople! You tired, you poor, you huddled masses gathering to take the Frontiers final today: we promise, college isn’t always like this. To provide some last-minute assistance, here are some haikus sent by one of your own. If you have other haikus, Frontiers-related or otherwise, leave ’em in the comments. Good luck, friends! Two distributions […]

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Lost: Cell phone

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 0 Comments

Black Verizon LG cellphone with slide-out keyboard possibly dropped between 116th station and River Hall. Reward offered. Emailcmd2159@columbia.edu if found.

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Professor Archetypes: The Activist

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 32 Comments

While working as a professor, the Activist is forced out of his/her/non-gender- specific-pronoun’s natural habitat. Best suited for the front lines of some genre of consciousness-raising event, this experienced and opinionated speaker captures the class with what seems at the time to be an extremely relevant argument against society’s unnecessary gendering of bath products. The Activist Professor sits crisscrossed […]

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The Finals Weekend Showdown: Finals vs. Papers

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 55 Comments

Another vintage post from our archives for you to contemplate while holed up in the library… With classes completed and a weekend now free to bemoan our misery, Bwoggers weigh in from Butler Cafe/salon: what’s worse, studying for finals or writing papers? Papers Remember: every essay is an open book test. With class notes, a few […]

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The Bwog Finals Fortune Teller

By Bwog Staff on Dec 18, 2010 14 Comments

We’re stuck in Butler too, wishing we were back in elementary school when all we had to do was color in the circles and not calculate their velocities relative to the Sun as they hurtle through space. Holding fast to the spirit of youth, we’ve created a cootie catcher. Now this toy you once used […]

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Overheard: People Are Having Fun

By Bwog Staff on Dec 17, 2010 31 Comments

Just not you! A girl on Broadway, to a group of friends: “I was so drunk I put my face on pizza.”

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Butler Bingo: Fall 2010 Edition, (Reposted for your prandial pleasures)

By Bwog Staff on Dec 17, 2010 39 Comments

Originally, Bingo was a lottery game called “Il Giuoco del Lotto d’Italia” invented and played in Italy around 1530. Usually, Bingo is a game played by your great aunt. Today, Bingo is a game that will make your procrastination dreams come true. Here’s how to play: sit in Butler. Look at the game board. Scroll […]

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The Graveyard Shift: Gamal at the Coffee Cart

By Bwog Staff on Dec 17, 2010 7 Comments

Our second installment of Graveyard Shift finds Diana Clarke hanging out with Gamal, late-night/early-morning coffee vendor on 114th Street. Remember: other people stay up late, too. Good luck studying. As students stumble home from Butler in the wee hours, they’re likely to pass a man stocking his coffee cart on 114th and Broadway with fresh […]

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NYT: Operation Ivy League “Typical,” Except for the “Ivy League” Part

By Bwog Staff on Dec 17, 2010 68 Comments

The New York Times published a story today that calls last week’s bust of a drug ring involving Columbia students “unremarkable, but for one thing: [the] Ivy League clients.” Below, we highlight some relevant new information that our (full disclaimer!) very own Eliza Shapiro helped report: The original anonymous call to Crime Stoppers that prompted […]

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Microsoft Word Just Doesn’t Get Us

By Bwog Staff on Dec 17, 2010 93 Comments

We, oppressed Humanities students, have discovered, through our weeks of crazed paper-writing, that Microsoft Word doesn’t know anything about anything. If “precolonial” isn’t a real word according to our computers, college is a lie. Here are some words Bwog was punished with that red squiggly line for writing recently. Add your own in the comments. […]

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Senior Wisdom: Ryan Kendall

Bwog Staff 12

"climb out of the cocoon of status"
"I regret nothing"
awesome people
bwog is uncivilized
cheese: choice snack of oral sex enthusiasts
RIP Pluto
rob this place blind -- this includes silverwear
senior wisdom
senior wisdom 2014

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Estimating Bacchanal’s Budget

Bwog Staff 31

"i'm a feminist" is the worst pick up line in the history of pick up lines including that falling from heaven one
#throwbacchanal
bacchanal
bacchanal budget mystery
does anyone actually call him snoop lion?
if only bwog could rap
investigative tipster journalists
lupe's not the worst
not bad for a days work
we should clearly become MCs they make good money

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Passing Through Passing Strange

Bwog Staff 4

an unnamed main character how artsy
bte
cmts
experimental theatre within experimental theatre!
i just had sex and it felt so good (felt so good)
if you don't have a ticket claw your way in tonight
passing strange
the "european way" is the only way to go
theatre reviews

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Hope For The Waitlisted

Bwog Staff 6

"welcome to columbia"
ahhh reminiscing about the college admissions process
applying to college aka the worst months of your life
bwog is really excited to have new freshmen
class of 2018
college confidential flashbacks
columbia is the center of the universe
may the odds be ever in your favor
waitlisted
waitlisted students: there's hope for you yet

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Rockin’ The Lock-In

Bwog Staff 6

all night in a library that is NOT butler
at least your classmates are down to help you out
class facebook pages
geology library
like what were you doing when they told everyone to clear out?
mixing it up
noon to five - really?
on that study grind
so THIS is what the class facebook page is for
too focused

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Run Without Borders

Bwog Staff 2

best part of any race: the refreshments
engineers without borders
get up early so you can do work all day...or take a nap
get your butt out of bed early
help them out even if you're not an engineer
road races
running into borders
running out of borders
sporty sport
sweat out that stress
that's some catchy-ass music
this 5k is not presided over by prezbo

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Bwoglines: Beezus Edition

Bwog Staff 2

beezus
bwoglines
come on us versus penn? you know what to do
proof that burt's bees is good for everything
the next rise of microsoft?
those triplets would get an interview
we would freak out about triplets on campus
yeah we know you just never want to think about don quixote again

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Senior Wisdom: Evelyn

Bwog Staff 12

"I grew up in a kosher home so I'm not used to having pork in my mouth"
bwog wants those sungalsses
dancing the night away with LeBron
senior wisdom
senior wisdom 2014
smoke weed get drunk have fun

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