“I don’t know… I think I’ve become more of an optimist since coming here…”

Staff Writer Daniel Ortega-Venni and Deputy Editor Caroline Mullooly bring you the best moments from Bwog Slack throughout this academic year.

Happening in the World: A flight in Melbourne, Australia hit a shopping center soon after take-off from Essendon Airport, killing the pilot and four passengers. Authorities found out that the plane’s rudder had been in the wrong position, a simple error that could have been fixed by the pilot before takeoff. Happening in the US: […]

Last weekend’s weather was great. We were all excited to tan our hairy legs after seeing the sun for the first time since October. But it seems that while some of us were busting out our Chubbies shorts, others had bigger plans to cherish those 12 hours of 65 degrees. Last night, around 8 pm, a black […]

Dear Vape God, Who are you? What inspired you to engrave your dankness upon the driven snow? I could only imagine the scene, a bundled figure at the peak of the blizzard, staring towards the North Star while dramatic clouds blend into the snowy sky. And you would be alone, of course, because you’re a […]

While shelving books in the library, a student worker came across what initially appeared to be a regular novel in the section near nation-states and the Anglosphere. Its title claimed to be Tess of the d’Urbervilles, written by Thomas Hardy – but when the student opened up the book, he found it to be a pageless and  hollowed-out fake. Instead, the fake […]

Last year, around this time, we posted about slices of bread that some bold young Barnard student had attached (with thumbtacks) to the bulletin boards in the Quad. Today, we received a tip that the bulletin board bread has returned – and this time, it’s in Plimpton.   There it is, plain as day: bread […]

And just when you thought Carman could not get more ratchet! Thanks to an anonymous, Columbia Housing might actually clean up this real life haunted house. This is beyond Mr. Clean. Yesterday, Bwog received a tip confirming what we all knew in our first-year hearts to be true anyway: Carman has mold. You can read […]

Earlier today (or, technically, yesterday), Bwog received the following tip: Caught a close up of the feasting hawk responsible for the rain of feathers in front of butler today. A former staffer suggests that this is the same hawk dubbed “hawkmadinejad” back in the 08 09 era. Pic attached. Same bird? The bird in question […]

Most of us look back on the early posts of our class Facebook groups with shame and bewilderment—they are testament to the one quality that freshmen at every institution embody: utter doltishness. If you’ve ever hoped that the species would evolve past this kind of posturing, it was in vain, for the Columbia Class of 2020 […]

Ostensibly, Carman has three elevators: two slow people-movers right past the security desk, and one freight elevator, if you’re willing to climb steps and walk through empty, circuitous, vaguely-menacing hallways. Of course, this hasn’t been the reality for the past few days—nearly a week. Instead, there has been only one operational elevator in a building housing […]

This year, Bacchanal seemed to come and go with a widespread consensus: it was kind of a disappointment. Few people were particularly interested in the headliners, and even fewer actually enjoyed the concert itself for more than one or two acts. Despite these odds, many of us still managed to get lit and stay there, […]

One week ago, CCSC took a stand on a very important and very pressing campus issue: toilet paper quality. Their petition on change.org provides a quote from “Joe the Pooper”, a student with particularly “anustounding” testimony regarding the unbelievably pathetic 2-ply TP Columbia’s top notch students are forced to deal with: “I’m a sophomore in […]

You can’t possibly be more down than this guy, face-down and sprawled in the dirt of the “CU Garden” (presumably—the sign’s been missing for a few days). Since we saw him standing upright a few weeks ago, we can only assume this lovable and inadequately-dressed scarecrow was defeated by none other than Snowstorm Jonas, the last […]

It’s one o’clock in the morning. You’ve just returned from Butler. You’ve promptly forgotten everything you learned during the studying you did at Butler. You wander the hallways of the Barnard quad, wondering what you’re doing with your life. And then, you see him: Pepe stares at you. His vacant blue eyes peer deep into […]